The Jaffe Briefing - November 1, 2017
OUR TAKE ON THE NEWS IN NEW JERSEY
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL - Where is Phil Murphy? That is the question from NJTV, which has noticed that the leading candidate for governor is all over our airwaves, but doesn't seem to be out campaigning with the same intense verve. NJTV reports there was only one public event on Monday and none yesterday, with less than a week to go. NJTV notes it is a common strategy among candidates with huge, double-digit leads. Just play it safe; don't say or do anything stupid. Makes sense, but Democrats still want to ensure high enthusiasm levels come Election Day.
IN THE KITCHEN CABINET - Now that your home is filled with piles of candy, time to take stock on what you keep, and what you cast off. The eggheads at FiveThirtyEight.com are here to help, developing the most definitive list of most-desired Halloween candy. No surprise that Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and their smaller sibling, Reese's Miniature, top the charts, with Twix, Kit-Kat, and Snickers rounding out the top five. And the dregs that you are likely passing around to co-workers this morning? Good & Plenty, Boston Baked Beans, Chiclets, Super Bubble, and one we've never heard of, yet sounds mildly inappropriate for trick-or-treaters: Nik-L-Nip.
NEWARK - Whole Foods will hold its own Amazon-style "hiring day" tomorrow, trying to recruit 6,000 workers nationwide, according to CNN. Prospective hires will have the opportunity to interview for full-and part-time positions tomorrow, with job offers possibly made on the spot. Amazon, it should be noted, bought the high-end grocery chain in August and this effort is reminiscent of the online titan's job fairs this summer that sought to fill 50,000 open positions in one day. With new Whole Foods locations in Newark and Metuchen, and many more about the state, it's time for job seekers to finally learn the difference between "Kelp Granules" and "Kale Littles."
ON THE ROAD - Do you avoid grocery stores, but still need a job? Then the New Jersey Truck Association has the perfect solution: Become a trucker. There is an aging population of drivers, as well as a lack of people willing to spend days away from home, mainly by themselves, driving down endless roads in an 18-wheeler, sipping awful coffee. Besides the long-haul work, there's also the need for people to spend their weekends delivering packages ordered online, for those who must have that double-ply toilet paper today. To dangle some carrots for the next generation, the truck association says salaries are pretty darn good, at $45,000 a year, and there's talk of apprenticeship programs and college associate degrees. So, saddle up! And, hey, keep an eye out for those Smokeys.
ONLY IN NEW JERSEY - Now that we're all dealing with the Halloween hangover, let's reflect that New Jersey is the only place in the world to use the term "Mischief Night." Yes, NJ 101.5 reports that there was a real, live academic study that found most places don't have a name for Halloween eve, but that some other possibilities include "Devil's Night," "Gate Night," "Trick Night," "Cabbage Night," and, our favorite "Goosey Night." New Jersey: The only state where you can toilet paper a tree and then get your gas pumped for you.
IN THE MEDIA
WINTER PARK, Fla. - A Florida couple gave the world a treat on Halloween - a new Frankenstein. The couple welcomed "Oskar Gary Frankenstein," who arrived after four days and 14 hours of crazy labor yesterday at Winter Park Memorial Hospital. The proud parents, Mr. and Mrs. Frankenstein, tell news outlets that Baby Frankenstein weighed in at 6 pounds, 9 ounces. It is the Frankenstein family's first baby born on Halloween. Lots of love and best wishes from the Draculas.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
WORD OF THE DAY
Bonce - [BONSS] - noun
Definition: Head or skull
Example: My bonce is pounding from all that Halloween candy.
WEATHER IN A WORD
Clouds