The Jaffe Briefing - July 15, 2022
The Jaffe Briefing is going on vacation, returning Wednesday, July 27
ON THE ROAD – The word “defund” is thrown around a lot these days, with Rep. Josh Gottheimer now using the term in his ongoing fight against the proposed NYC congestion pricing that could cost Jersey commuters upwards of $5,000 a year. You may recall the Metropolitan Transportation Authority is actively trying to screw New Jersey commuters, surcharging anyone who dares drive into Manhattan south of 60th Street. This money grab would then fund subway improvements under the lofty guise of easing traffic and air pollution. But this scheme requires federal approval; that’s where the congressman sees opportunity. Fine, have your damn surcharge, Gottheimer says, but the MTA must then give Jersey drivers a credit on all bridges and tunnels into Manhattan for an equal amount. And if not? Then the feds would “defund” the implementation of this bogus congestion tax clearly designed for New Jersey workers to pay for NYC infrastructure.
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL – After losing out on a role in the “paused” Jersey Shore 2.0 reboot, Snooki has landed another paying gig, doing a video for a senatorial hopeful in Pennsylvania. And how is she possibly relevant? Democratic candidate John Fetterman is spending the summer reminding voters that his opponent, Dr. Mehmet Oz, hails from New Jersey. You may recall the candidate paid for an airplane to fly a banner in Avalon last weekend, which read “HEY DR. OZ, WELCOME HOME TO NJ! ♥ JOHN.” The snarky Democrat now posted a Twitter video of Snooki, with 2 million views so far. She says, in part: “Hey Mehmet! I heard you moved from Jersey to Pennsylvania to look for a new job…. Jersey will not forget you. I will not forget you. And don’t worry. You will be back home in Jersey soon.”
TRENTON – If a patient needs to take a drug that electronically monitors his or her progress, that’s great technology, right? Well, no, says, Assemblymember Parker Space, who wants to ban the manufacture and prescription of this emerging medical technology in New Jersey, despite obvious medical marvels. And, sigh, why? “My fear is with the world today and the socialist form of government that seems to be controlling the United States, where would this end?” Space tells Politico. The GOP lawmaker from Sussex County, one of the most conservative lawmakers in the state Legislature, is also worried these high-tech drugs could be hacked, so anyone, anywhere, would have access to how a drug is affecting grandma as she watches “Wheel of Fortune.” Darn those meddling Russians.
BRIEFING BREATHER
Winston Churchill's mother was from Brooklyn.
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL – Chris Christie: the shining future of America. Wow. That, at least, is the thinking of Maryland Gov. Larry Hogan, who in 2015 claimed to be “extremely excited” that the former governor could one day be president. Hogan, who may join the gaggle of normal Republicans who dares to compete for the GOP presidential nomination against Trump, tells New Jersey Globe that “there’s no question there’s a future for Chris Christie in the Republican Party. He’s one of our true leaders, and he’s a very good friend.” If Christie does decide to dip his toe into the ’24 race, there’s a treasure chest full of goodies that his competitors can dig out from his years as New Jersey governor. Or click “Google.”
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
JEROME, Ariz. – Perhaps there needs to be some etiquette classes in this old mining own, as the old coots keep shouting at visitors and leaving menacing messages on their cars. It has gotten so bad amongst the ill-mannered townsfolk that Jerome police have issued a warning: Stop shouting at tourists or be fined. Jerome, with its population of 450, was once home to one of the state’s biggest copper mines and has been reinvented as a haven for starving artists, to the disgust of dusty old-timers. Visitors are attracted to the scenic view, as well as the artsy stores and bars, along a winding mountain road. Cops posted this Facebook message: “Yelling at, or leaving notes could, in some cases, constitute harassment.”
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was the end of the perfect marriage in 1996, when Charles and Diana sign divorce papers.
WORD OF THE DAY
Postulate – [PAHSS-chuh-layt] – verb
Definition: To assume or claim something (such as an idea or theory) as true, especially for the purposes of starting a discussion.
Example: I postulate that boardwalk custard tastes exactly the same as boardwalk ice cream.
WIT OF THE DAY
“In America, the President resigns for four years, and journalism governs forever and ever.”
-Oscar Wilde
BIDEN BLURB
“I put a helmet on because this is a tough interview.”
-Joe Biden
WEATHER IN A WORD
Beauty