The Jaffe Briefing - March 3, 2022
SCOTCH PLAINS – General rule: If someone reaches you online with a great investment opportunity, it isn’t. TAPInto SP/F reports the sad story of a local resident who lost more than $800,000 in an internet scam, offering an opportunity to buy gold. This investor downloaded a mobile app and wired money to Hong Kong. Yeah, this is already sounding fishy. Anyway, bogus statements showed the victim had an account ballooning to more than $1 million. But when the person tried to take out the cash, he or she learned the account was “closed” and the cash had vanished. Local cops state the obvious: don’t rely on social media for investments and fully research opportunities.
ON THE ROAD – You know that EZ-Pass thingee you’ve had stuck to your windshield for years. Well, it’s at the end of its life; the battery will soon die. You may be surprised to learn that (a) these things have a shelf life and (b) yours will be getting replaced at no cost to you. NJ.com reports that 920,000 of these transponders (yes, that is what they are officially called) will be swapped out in New Jersey, as the Turnpike Authority mails out replacements to customers. There will be a postage-paid envelope for customers to send back the old transponders which, we assume, will be refurbished and reissued. The new doo-hickeys have batteries that will last about 10 years, so you’ve got plenty of time for the next big tag swap.
BRIEFING BREATHER
Barry Manilow didn't write his hit song "I Write the Songs."
RED BANK - The ever rising cost of medicine is a bitter pill to swallow for many struggling Americans, so one pharmacist is being hailed for launching New Jersey’s first free-medication drugstore. The Ritesh Shah Charitable Pharmacy at 224 Shrewsbury Ave. offers commonly-used medications for chronic conditions such as high blood pressure and heart disease to uninsured customers struggling to make ends meet. Shah, who was inspired to open the pharmacy after his sister died of COVID-19, will seek nonprofit status, according to the Red Bank Green. Until then, he will generously cover the costs out-of-pocket. Just what the doctor ordered – or at least prescribed.
POINT PLEASANT BEACH – The mayor is taking public service to a whole new level, travelling to the Polish border of Ukraine, where he will rent a big passenger van and help shuttle refugees to displacement centers, bus depots and train stations. Mayor Paul Kanitra will be taking a break from adopting municipal ordinances to volunteer with relief organizations, including World Central Kitchen and Global Empowerment Mission. NJ.com notes the local chamber of commerce is pitching in, collecting clothes and funds to help supply border resources. Dire conditions have been reported, as up to 4 million people try to escape the Russian onslaught.
STATEWIDE – New Jersey: a beacon for refugees. In a letter to President Biden, Gov. Phil Murphy says the state will warmly welcome some of these Ukrainian refugees, r as it appears that millions of displaced people – mostly women and children – will be successfully fleeing the war-torn country in the upcoming weeks and months. New Jersey is already home to about 75,000 people of Ukrainian descent and, according to Murphy, is prepared to “extend a warm and sincere welcome” to many, many others.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
BEVERLY HILLS, CA – Stop the presses for this important announcement: A judge yesterday declared Kim Kardashian to be “legally single” over a year after she filed for divorce from Kanye West. No longer will she go by the name of Mrs. Kardashian West. (Gasp!) Of course, like any of the many other Kardashian break-ups, this one is messy, loud and clinically stupid. Reporters are all over the court filings, reporting this tidbit from Kim: the “court terminating our marital status will help Kanye to accept that our marital relationship is over and to move forward on a better path which will assist us in peacefully co-parenting our children." Meanwhile, Kanye is repeatedly attacking Kardashian's current boyfriend, Pete Davidson, on social media, acting just like any other bitter 12-year-old. The rapper also fired his fourth divorce attorney just before the hearing and is probably seething at the fifth one, who didn’t object to the judge declaring Kardashian legally single. Read all about it, in the latest Instagram meltdowns.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was this day in 2013 that Queen Elizabeth II was admitted to the hospital for observation as a precautionary measure, following a brief bout of unscheduled smiling. No one knew why, setting off alarm bells.
WORD OF THE DAY
Kitsch – [KITCH] – noun
Definition: Something that appeals to popular or lowbrow taste and is often of poor quality.
Example: People are quick to assume my car mirror dice, plastic flamingos, and dashboard hula dancers are kitsch.
WIT OF THE DAY
“Over the past 24 hours there were 7 occasions of shelling and two casualties. Figures may vary, but only one figure makes the morning good. It is zero. The shelling is zero. The loss is zero.”
-Volodymyr Zelensky
BIDEN BLURB
“Putin sought to shake the very foundations of a free world, thinking he could make it bend to his menacing ways. But he badly miscalculated. He thought he could roll into Ukraine and the world will roll over. Instead, he met with a wall of strength he never anticipated or imagined — he met Ukrainian people
-Joe Biden
WEATHER IN A WORD
Blustery