The Jaffe Briefing - January 24, 2022
STATEWIDE – For years, New Jerseyans have been questioning the need for all these itty-bitty school districts and all the duplication of efforts. Really, does a small K-8 school district need a superintendent, an assistant superintendent and a building principal? Even with all the logical calls for consolidation, there was no cash to conduct important studies. So, the status quo reigned. But, finally, the state is taking on the 600 or so school districts, adopting a law that explores the cost savings of countywide and regional school districts, NJ.com reports. Of course, some parents will howl that the days of their little schoolhouse are numbered. But imagine what can happen when school districts share resources to provide courses and programs that could not be afforded before. And the fact that Maryland has a total of 24 school districts, and Nevada has just 18, shows the impossible may be possible in New Jersey.
NOT FORT LEE – For a short, glorious while, New Jersey had this monopoly in online sports betting, reaping more than $1 billion a month in wages. In fact, New Yorkers would regularly travel over the GWB to Fort Lee to place a bet in the local Dunkin Donuts parking lot. Well, those days, from this fall, are history. Now that sports betting is legal in New York, beginning January 1, the nascent industry is already reporting more than $611 million in bets from the phones and computers of New Yorkers. With just a little bit of math, we can project more than $1.2 billion in bets just for January, putting the Empire State in direct competition with the Garden State for the ripest sports betting market in the land. And with the NFL playoffs here, and March Madness on the horizon, things will only get rosier, as the states go head-to-head.
MONMOUTH JUNCTION - A local mom is vowing to never let her 2-year-old son play with her phone again after several large packages with items such as accent chairs and flower stands began arriving at their home. It seems the 22-month-old was able to access her Walmart.com shopping cart and place an order of almost $2,000 in home furnishings, some of which barely fit through the front door of the family’s new home. The dad incredulously tells NBC, “It is really hard to believe that he has done this.” Oh yeah? Well, this family should expect many, many more online orders when this screen-savvy kid becomes a teenager and develops an affinity for the latest Nikes.
BRIEFING BREATHER
Adolf Hitler was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize.
LAVALLETTE – ‘Goodfella’ Joe Pesci didn’t want to retire in this small hamlet on Ocean County’s barrier island, but plenty of others do. Little Lavallette was just named “America’s #1 retirement destination.” Real estate website Zillow says its page views show Lavallette is the nation’s most-searched community among folks over-55 looking to retire, a surprise to us, as our teeth chatter this January. Seven of Zillow’s other top 10 retirement towns are sensibly in Florida. But, Lavallette has plenty going for it: It’s got New Jersey’s last Ben Franklin five-and-dime store, a “99 Beer Club” at the Crabs Claw Inn, and an ice cream shop with a nightly cabaret. Pesci, 78, sold his oceanfront home here for $6.5 million last year to retire in California. But there are still some “bargains” in Lavallette, where the average home is now selling for $875,000.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
CARLOW, Ireland – So, it seems a man’s body was dragged to the local post office in the hopes of collecting his pension. The Irish Times reports the dearly departed seems to be in his 60s, as he was presented at the post office by two younger men on Friday. When obvious questions were posed, the two men ran away, leaving behind the corpse. Ireland’s national police force, the Garda Siochana, isn’t really talking, but did admit an active investigation involving the “unexplained death of an elderly male.” According to the Irish Times, one of the younger men had inquired about collecting someone’s pension and was told that the recipient had to be there. Thus, the plan was hatched.
STATEWIDE – Happy Income Tax Filing Day. Yep, the season opens today, and a short-staffed IRS will be immediately overwhelmed. The AP reports about some failed legislation that would have given the tax authority billions of dollars to create better ways to process all the filings. The White House is already projecting “unacceptable backlogs” that could stretch for weeks, as the taxman will be buried under paper through the spring. One key headache: the IRS still hasn’t finished processing all the 2020 tax returns. And now there’s expected to be about 10 million people calling or visiting the IRS, asking for some small degree of customer service. Expect many, many delays, as no tax form this year will be EZ.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was this day in 1984 that the Apple Macintosh was unveiled as the PC of the future, showing raw computer power with 128 kb of memory, a slot for a floppy disk and a nine-inch, black-and-white screen.
WORD OF THE DAY
Yurt – [yərt] – noun
Definition: A circular tent of felt or skins on a collapsible framework, used by nomads in Mongolia, Siberia, and Turkey.
Example: Bob clearly spoiled his cat with the new yurt.
WIT OF THE DAY
“I’m not saying I suck at homeschooling my kids but my daughter just asked, ‘Dad, what’s a synonym?’ And I replied, ‘It’s a spice.'”
-Joe Heenan
BIDEN BLURB
“Some people may call what’s happening now the `new normal.’ I call it a job not yet finished. It will get better.”
- Joe Biden
WEATHER IN A WORD
Brisk