The Jaffe Briefing - December 3, 2021

TRENTON – Stunning that the news of the day at the Statehouse has nothing to do with the people’s business. Rather it’s about some headline-grabbing Republican lawmakers, who flagrantly ignored the Statehouse mandate to show a vaccination card or a negative test – following the deaths of nearly 28,500 New Jerseyans from this stubborn pandemic. These lawmakers ignored state troopers after a 15-minute standoff at the door and then walked right in. They were even given the opportunity to take a rapid test, just so lawmakers could move on to their central job of lawmaking. That didn’t happen. Instead, Republicans like Assemblyman Erik Peterson of Hunterdon called such demands “tyranny, folks.” Another gem from Assemblyman Hal Wirths of Sussex, telling NJ.com that “liberty is dying right here.” So is all sensibility.

PALISADES PARK – Hey, bank with us! Your money will be sorta safe. That was the unplanned message for the borough, which reached a settlement with a bank that drained hundreds of thousands of dollars from the municipal bank accounts through fraudulent bank transfers, the Record reports. The town had a terrific argument with its bank, claiming it failed to have the security procedures in place to ensure taxpayer money would not be stolen. Borough lawyers threw around lots of impressive terms, like “breach of fiduciary duty” and “breach of contract” and “consumer fraud.” The town was made whole, thankfully, while the bank will have to provide many, many more toasters if it hopes to win back the municipal account.

BRIEFING BREATHER

There is an annual coffee break festival.

PISCATAWAY – Sure, feel free to moan and groan that the Rutgers football team will not be in a bowl this year, despite the gobs of money that is spent year after year in our lofty attempt to achieve a .500 record. But pack that all away, at least for this moment, as the Rutgers women’s soccer team is having an awesome season, clinching a berth in the Final Four in a gutsy, shoot-out win last week before an ecstatic, hot-chocolate guzzling, partially-frozen crowd last Friday in Piscataway. Now the team is in southern California, taking on No. 1 Florida State at 7 p.m. tonight. Yeah, our fifth-ranked women’s soccer team is not a big money-maker for RU, despite the thousands who showed up to see them beat Arkansas last week. But maybe, just maybe, they will make history as the first Rutgers team to win a NCAA national championship and finally get the widespread attention this talented team deserves.

IN THE MEDIA

STATEWIDE – Expect more scathing tell-all stories about the cafeteria’s mystery meat and the scratchiness of the bathroom toilet paper, as student journalists are about to get some real protection, courtesy of the state Legislature. There’s a bill heading to Gov. Phil Murphy, again, that would ban school districts from censoring the school paper unless there’s libel, slander, invasion of privacy, violation of law, obscene or profane language or inciting danger. Moreover, the faculty member who oversees the school paper would be protected from any retaliation, as he or she helps students exercise this “freedom of expression.” This important law was created after a new principal at Hunterdon Central High School demanded to see the paper before it was printed. Yeah, you can’t do that, pal.

IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS

COPENHAGEN, Denmark – Luckily, there were plenty of beds. An IKEA furniture showroom turned into a vast bedroom, as six customers and about two dozen employees were stranded by a snowstorm and spent Wednesday night in the superstore. A foot of snow quickly fell at closing time, trapping everyone. That prompted a slumber party in the furniture exhibitions and showroom, filled with plenty of beds, mattresses and sofa beds, Ekstra Bladet reports. There was also TV and munchies, prompting one customer to note: “It’s much better than sleeping in one’s car.” Instead, inside Ikea, she got one nightstand.

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

It was this day in 1997 that Golden State Warrior guard Latrell Sprewell loses $32 million, fired for attacking coach PJ Carlesimo.

WORD OF THE DAY

Smarmy – [SMAR-mee] – adjective

Definition: Behaving in a way that seems polite, kind, or pleasing but is not genuine or believable

Example: Sean Connery played James Bond as suave and cool. Roger Moore, in contrast, made Bond seem so smarmy.

WIT OF THE DAY

“Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother's side.” 

- Archie Bunker

BIDEN BLURB

“And now I want to turn us over to another special guest, Rabbi Lauren Hols- — Holtzblatt — Holtzblatt — excuse me — you can call me “Bidden.”

-Joe Biden

WEATHER IN A WORD

Seasonal