The Morning Briefing - August 15, 2016
AT SEA – You probably are enjoying your new yacht right now, sitting on the deck, sipping espresso and reading this. Right? Well, of course you are, after Gov. Chris Christie slashed in half the sales tax on new boats and yachts. With all that savings, apparently many more people can now run out and buy the vessel of the dreams. The cuts went into place last December, NJ 101.5 reports, but the New Jersey Marine Trade Association says it is still too early to assess if the tax break has spiked the sagging industry. Any boat owner will tell you that buying the thing is just the first step in a litany of expenses, such as the marina rental, the winter wrap and paying for all your mother-in-law’s on-board martinis.
CRANFORD – Sure, you may be focused on the Olympics, but the real competition takes place on September 11. That’s when the perfect purveyors of paella participate in the “International Valencian Paella Contest” in Sueca, Spain. There are three chefs from the U.S. going for the gold, and that includes Manny Rey of Cranford, whose day job is a financial advisor for Wells Fargo. A recognized pillar of Iberian gastronomy, Rey vows his hobby mixes raw talent, great taste, and a quasi secret that chefs around the world can’t match. The world will be watching.
AT SEA – Three pals better like leftover tuna casserole. That’s because they just hooked a 236½-pound Bigeye tuna, netting $767,091 in cash winnings for Trenton fireman Rich Kosztyu, police sergeant Brian Suschke and their boat-owner friend Damien Romeo from Forked River. The trio's jumbo catch won first prize in an Ocean City, Md. fishing tournament's tuna category. The three lifelong friends told N.J. Advance Media they were 80 miles offshore when Kosztyu hooked the fish and fought it for an hour before being able to reel it in. The trio intends to split their winnings, and a lifetime worth of tuna.
MANVILLE – Call Ripley's! Believe it or not, people here hate tax hikes. Shocking. A standing-room-only crowd squeezed into the council's cramped chamber last week to gripe about a new property revaluation, the Home News-Tribune says. Mayor Richard Onderko assured them the borough did its bit, with a hiring freeze and outsourcing the municipal court. “We balanced our budget,” the mayor said, blaming the sinister state for not coughing up Manville's fair share of school aid. And, he made a sales pitch for Gov. Chris Christie's pie-in-the-sky “Fairness Formula” that could double per-pupil aid to $9.3 million. Yet, grasping at straws probably isn't the best tax plan.
ON THE ROAD – Are you another godless heathen looking to burn in hell for all eternity? Then, hey, time to celebrate with a Cumberland County woman who just reached a court-sanctioned deal with the state Motor Vehicle Commission, allowing her 8THEIST license plates. After Shannon Morgan got denied in 2013, she enlisted help from a religious liberty watchdog group and sued. Under the settlement, N.J. Advance Media says the MVC will now also issue plates for: ATHEISM, BLASFMR, EQUALITY, FEMINISM, FEMINST, GAYPOWR, GODLESS, HEATHEN, HERETIC, LGBTQ, QUEER, SKEPTIC, TRANS, 4WOMEN plus several others Not to worry, the puritans at MVC still have list of 1,000 other banned words. Still, it only costs a $400 filing fee to make a FDRL-CASE out of those too.
IN THE MEDIA
HARDWICK VT. – Ever dream of owning a weekly newspaper in a small, rural, cash-strapped town? Here's your big chance to win one … not buy it. The 71-year-old publisher of the Hardwick Gazette wants to retire, but can’t find any takers for the weekly he and his late wife bought in 1986. So, Ross Connelly will give it away to whoever writes the best 400-word essay on the value of hyper-local journalism. Submissions must be mailed (there's no email) along with a $175 entry fee. The deadline is Sept. 20, but no decision will be made unless Connelly gets at least 700 submissions so he can walk away with at least $122,500. The winner gets the paper, its old building, a dusty old Linotype machine, and several well-used computers that still use 5¼-inch floppy disks. Entry rules are surprisingly on the Internet at: www.hardwickgazette.com.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was this day in 1998 that an Ice Age fell over the White House, as Bill admits to Hillary that, uh, he did kinda had a sorta sex with that woman.
WORD OF THE DAY
Palooka [puh-LOO-kuh] - noun
Definition: an awful boxer
Example: You bet on that Palooka? You nuts? Newark's Shakur Stevenson sure ain't no palooka, after defeating Brazil's Robenilson de Jesus in the quarterfinal round at Rio 2016.
WEATHER IN A WORD
Heat.