The Morning Briefing - May 18, 2016
** The Morning Briefing is taking a brief morning break, returning Tuesday, May 31
TRENTON – As the gubernatorial campaign heats up, it remains unclear why anyone would want this crazy job. Today, state bean counters will be testifying about the anticipated $1.1 billion hole in the state budget forecasted over the next two fiscal years. It looks as if Gov. Chris Christie will have to slash and burn his way out of office, perhaps pawning his office curtains just to pay for a midnight Uber back to Mendham. Then, it will be up to the next guy (or girl) to magically rebuild the coffers, perhaps borrowing from Delaware to pay Pennsylvania and flatly refusing to take calls from New York.
TRENTON - In another example of the nanny state run wild, the State Senate is mulling a bill to ban flavored electronic cigarettes other than clove, menthol and tobacco. You've probably seen those kiosks popping up at the local mini-mall, populated by clusters of somewhat questionable people sucking on battery-powered boxes, blowing clouds of what looks like dance floor fog-machine fog into the air. Sure, it's obnoxious, and shouldn’t be in the hands of children. But a ban? That's like banning flavored ice cream because it makes people fat. Set an appropriate age limit and tightly enforce the rule – just like with booze.
BAYONNE – Sounds more like a “big chill,” than a hiring freeze. Yet a one-year “hiring freeze” is what Mayor Jimmy Davis ordered yesterday to hush concerns about his city's financial health. The mayor's “freeze” makes exceptions, like police officers, firefighters and crossing guards. Sure. No need to risk safety just to save a few bucks. The mayor's order also makes exceptions for 225 summer and seasonal employees; a few workers handling Bayonne's property tax revaluation; and absorbing employees from the Municipal Utilities Authority now being dissolved, the Jersey Journal reports. Citing his fiscal responsibility, Davis called his freeze an example of "government in action.”
HAMILTON - The annual New Jersey Legislative Correspondents Club show -New Jersey's version of the White House Correspondent's Dinner - is tonight. But Gov. Christie has opted to skip the political roast. Last year, the governor made headlines - first reported in the Morning Briefing - when he delivered a profanity-laced speech at the on-the-record affair, all of which was in jest, of course. This year's dinner promises to be tame in comparison.
WEST ORANGE – In an out-of-this-world decision, school officials will be renaming the Pleasantdale Elementary School in West Orange after the town’s two celebrity astronauts: twins Scott and Mark Kelly. It all happens tomorrow morning, when the alumni astronauts will be on hand at newly-named Kelly Elementary for an invitation-only event, with the district streaming the festivities online. You may know all about these retired spacemen; Scott spent a record 520 days in space, Mark is married to former U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords.
EAST RUTHERFORD – It seems a big sigh of relief should be heard from the taxpayers of East Rutherford, as the town council unanimously voted to pass the buck to the New Jersey Sports and Exposition Authority, which now would issue $675 million in bonds for the mega-mall in the Meadowlands. Originally, the plan was for the town to issue the bonds, as part of this $3.2-billion financing plan to finally complete the 2.9-million-square-foot American Dream project that has languished in the parking lot for a decade. As the project crawls to a finish, and the financing a concoction of partners, entities and investors, perhaps its best for East Rutherford to leave the deal-making to the pros.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
DENVER – A babysitter may need a new way to score free Oreos, as she now faces charges of using the two girls she was watching to help rob a bank. It gets worse: she needed the money to pay back $15,000 she stole from someone else. The Greeley Tribune reports the sitter picked up two sisters from school on Friday, drove around a bit, bought them lollipops, removed the license plates from her Pathfinder and then headed over to a local bank. At the drive-thru, she passed a note to the teller threatening she would hurt the girls, who are 7 and 1½ years old, if she didn’t get cash. The teller handed over $500 and then, as such a stellar baby sitter, she brought the girls to the park to play, as she reinstalled her license plates. Cops nabbed her later, after nappies.
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL – Bernie Sanders is bewitching Oregon in more ways than one. Sure, his primary win Tuesday in the Beaver State brought the Democratic presidential contender's delegate total up to 1,528. (Who would have believed that?) But, while New Jerseyans are content holding Sanders rallies and ice cream giveaways, his Wiccan supporters in Oregon held public rituals in parks last weekend. No bubbling caldrons, but the Los Angeles Times says groups of witches burned dried sweetgrass, stood in circles around candles, wildflowers and imitation ballot boxes, while chanting “be the Bern, be the Bern, be the Bern.” One witch told the Times the ritual helps the “amplification of positive energy of Bernie Sanders and the progressive movement.” Also, free “Feel the Bern” stickers for all the brooms.
YOUR MIND – Think you have a lot of friends? Think again. A study in the scientific journal “PLOS One” says you may think someone is your pal, but they may think differently. The study looked at more than 1,300 perceived friendships among college peers. College students were asked to give their classmates a score of 0-5 based on friendship, with 0 meaning “I don’t know this person” and 5 meaning “One of my best friends,” reports NJ 101.5. They were also asked to guess how the other participants would score them. Subjects figured mutual friendship would be about 94 percent of the time, but the end result: just more than half. An unscientific, sure-fire way to find friends: Ask for help to move a couch from the basement.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was on this day in 1897 that Bram Stoker’s new novel, “Dracula, or, The Un-dead” was performed in London – marking the first of what has become countless versions, remakes, interpretations, sequels and “originals” of the same blood-thirsty, nocturnal vampire.
WORD OF THE DAY
Lollapalooza – noun
Definition: An extraordinary thing, person, or event.
Example: With no Morning Briefing to write until May 31, we look forward to enjoying many lollapaloozas.
WEATHER IN A WORD
Gray.