The Morning Briefing - August 3, 2015
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL - The discourse in the GOP primary continues its descent to the lowest common denominator, as CNN baited Gov. Chris Christie into saying he would punch the American Federation of Teachers in the face. "At the national level, who deserves a punch in the face?" asked CNN host Jake Tapper. Christie - acting anything but presidential - responded: "The national teachers' union, who's already endorsed Hillary Clinton 16, 17 months before the election," adding "They're not for education for our children. They're for greater membership, greater benefits, greater pay for their members." Good headlines, very Trump-like.
OCEANPORT - Fans went wild yesterday for American Pharoah; not so much for Gov. Chris Christie, underscoring recent polls among New Jerseyans. Christie got a relentless cascade of boos from 60,983 horse racing fans when he entered the Monmouth Park winner's circle to present a trophy to the Triple Crown winner. The crowd was whipped up again when his name was mentioned. Side note: A $2 bet for American Pharoah earned you 20 cents. A $2 bet for Christie somehow wining the GOP nomination? Could fund that new Hudson tunnel.
PHILADELPHIA - Amazing to see what a visit from Pope Francis will be like next month, as transit officials are launching a special online lottery today for one-day rail passes. Winners can choose to buy 10 of the $10 one-day tickets for the big visit on Sept. 26-27. Transit officials say a lottery is the only sane way they can deal with the crazy demand for tickets into Philly.
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL - As media waste time scrutinizing Donald Trump's 15-minutes of fame, they are learning with no great surprise that his claims of enormous generosity can't be proven. Trump says he donated $102 million over the past five years, but has no documentation. He has not supported his own foundation since 2008, meaning any of its recent donations were given by others. Last year, the Trump Organization described him as an "ardent philanthropist" on his official bio. AP notes that phrase has since been removed.
MAHWAH - If you ever find a big bag of cash, don't rush right out to spend it. Learn from the 42-year-old Hillside man who is charged with making off with $141,000 that two ATM workers mistakenly left outside a Mahwah business last week. He used part of his bounty to buy a big, beautiful $45,000 Chevy Tahoe. Using surveillance video, police tracked down the old white van that the Hillside suspect and his partner used when they picked up the moneybag. His partner is still at large, but the suspect is being held on $125,000 bail. Let's see if his lawyer tries the "finders keepers; losers weepers" defense.
TRENTON - Proving that there really are "lies, damned lies, and statistics," a consumer research firm has somehow named Trenton as the No. 1 city in America to be a cop. Value Penguin also listed among America's Top 30 "Best Cities for Police Officers" Atlantic City at 5th; Ocean City, 10th; Newark, 12th; and Edison Township 29th. The firm's 20-something numbers-geeks based their picks on police salaries, cost of living, location and crime data. Clearly these guys don't leave their basement offices very often: their list includes many of America's most dangerous cities like Miami and Detroit.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
SCARBOROUGH, Maine - A Patriots fan - with tons of disposable cash and an affinity for confirmed cheater Tom Brady - hired a plane to fly a banner over NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell's vacation home in Maine, telling him to go back to New York. Local television reports the die-hard fan is peeved that Brady has received a suspension for his rampant lying in "Deflate-gate." The banner instructed Goodell to "Jet back to New York."
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was this day in 2011 that a 20-million-year-old skull is discovered in Uganda, perhaps the slightly older brother of Larry King.
WORD OF THE DAY
Kakorrhaphiophobia - noun
Definition: Fear of failure
Example: This is the last word that someone with kakorrhaphiophobia would want to encounter in a spelling bee.