The Jaffe Briefing - June 28, 2022
TRENTON – So, it looks like New Jersey has a budget that Democrats can live with: a$50.6 billion spending plan with no additional taxes, a $6 billion rainy-day fund and a full payment for the underfunded pension system, Politico reports. The highlights – thanks to this unprecedented amount of surplus funds and tax receivables – ensures the state will have the largest stockpile of extra cash in its history, $12.7 billion earmarked for education and $2 billion in an expanded property tax giveback. Moreover, a total of $2.9 billion is headed to three agencies always desperate for cash: the Schools Development Authority, the state Department of Transportation and NJ Transit. Sounds good, with a spending plan in place before Thursday’s deadline. So, see y’all at the beach.
TRENTON – But wait. Could it be that easy? Republicans say all these budget details have been put together at the last minute, leaving little time to pick through it all and engage in feisty budget committee debates. Sen. Declan O’Scanlon called it all “insane,” claiming state lawmakers are poised to pass a $50 billion budget “that literally no one has ever seen,” NJ.comreports. These late moves are nothing new; 11th hour budget deals have been part of the Trenton landscape under both political parties since the days Gov. William Livingston signed parchment with his quill pen. But, maybe next year, the governor could demand that New Jerseyans get just a wee bit more time to peruse hundreds of pages of line items.
BRIEFING BREATHER
Pearls melt in vinegar
WEST CALDWELL – Buying a house formerly owned by a U.S. Supreme Court justice can be ho-hum, unless that Supreme Court justice just decided that 167 million Americans should no longer have reproductive rights over their own bodies. NJ.com reports that the current homeowners have been receiving plenty of hate mail, reserved for the former resident, Samuel Alito, author of the leaked memo overturning Roe v. Wade. He moved out of New Jersey in 2007 when he secured a spot on the high court. “Erroneous information was circulating on the internet that indicated that Justice Alito still resides in West Caldwell, and individuals have been sending harassing packages to the current resident,” local cops say, adding that people should stop harassing the current homeowners or face criminal charges.
MADISON – Dean Wormer is ticked at his host town, claiming Madison deliberately strung Drew University along on a plan to purchase wooded acres of campus land for affordable housing, as part of a grand plan to delay poorer people from moving into the leafy enclave. NJ.com reports the gown is now suing the town, saying that if Madison went along with the plan, the municipality could have at least 100 more units of state-mandated affordable housing, while Drew could sell off some land it doesn’t need. Drew is claiming that Madison deliberately missed deadlines and ghosted the school, while the university blew through $500,000 to answer the town’s questions about the proposed deal. Town officials, meanwhile, say Drew is just desperate for cash after “years of deficits,” and is still open to a deal, at some point, in the future. But a lawsuit plastered on the front page of today’s Star-Ledger certainly doesn’t move the needle.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
MANCHESTER, UK – Here’s yet another reason to ignore the gym: A British tattoo artist is now offering his client a gym-free “six pack.” It takes about 10 hours under an excruciating needle over the course of two days, as the artist stencils in, and then colors, the perfect abs. “I feel there’s so much negative in the world and people could do with a laugh,” the artist said, adding he is now looking for amputees in which he can offer “color realism tattoos,” whatever that may mean. “The crazier, the better,” he says. “Tag your crazy friends and inbox me your ideas!”
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was this day in 1994 that “Meet the Flintstones,” performed by the B52s, reaches No. 33 on the Billboard charts, showing America’s appreciation for the finest of music.
WORD OF THE DAY
Majuscule – [MAJ-uh-skyool] – noun
Definition: A large letter, like a capital
Example: According to the end-of-the year report card, there have been some random emphatic majuscules on my fifth grader’s homework.
WIT OF THE DAY
“There are people so addicted to exaggeration that they actually can't tell the truth without lying.”
-Josh Billings
BIDEN BLURB
“I exaggerate when I'm angry, but I've never gone around telling people things that aren't true about me.”
-Joe Biden
WEATHER IN A WORD
Perfect