The Jaffe Briefing - November 30, 2021
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL – It’s sure expensive to sway the mood of voters. And that’s what Democrats learned in the last election, as Politico reports they spent four times as much as Republicans in the state legislative elections. Despite the fact the Democrats and outside groups threw $38.6 million at the 40 legislative districts, they still lost seven seats. Meanwhile, the Republicans and the super PACs kicked in “only” $10.5 million for a very successful election, narrowing the Democrats majority in the Senate to 24-16 and 46-34 in the Assembly. And – if you ask the likes of Senate President Steve Sweeney – you’ll hear that campaign spending is irrelevant when voters are eager for any kind of change. Another brutal lesson: there’s no longer such a thing as a “safe seat” in New Jersey.
STATEWIDE – There’s nothing more romantic than a tearful wedding, a public display of a lifetime of love. And Sen. Michael Testa Jr. thinks a wedding on Zoom may be just as good, introducing a bill that would allow anyone in New Jersey to get hitched online. Gov. Phil Murphy allowed virtual marriages and civil unions in a May 2020 executive order, but that expired in July, New Jersey Monitor reports. Zoom could be a big saver over a full-fledged wedding, which typically sets the blushing nuptials back $50,000 or so on the road to a lifetime of mutual debt. Online weddings could also be great for military spouses, people with disabilities and busy, career-minded couples who don’t particularly need to be anywhere near each other to exchange vows before they depart on separate honeymoons.
WILDWOOD – City authorities are issuing a public message: If you happen to find any World War II-era bombs on the beach, don’t play with them or take them over to a friend’s house for a look. Residents were evacuated from West Pine and Maple avenues for nearly three hours on Saturday when a resident found a 120mm projectile on the beach and figured it made perfect sense to bring it over to a pal. Cops were quick to note the munition was still live, prompting a very quick evacuation, as the Atlantic City bomb squad rushed to the scene. The squad brought the projectile back to the beach, where it was deemed “safe.” And that prompted this odd city decree to residents and visitors: “If you locate any munitions on the beach or anywhere else in the city, please do not touch or handle them.” Unclear why World War II bombs ended up in Wildwood, as the seaside resort wasn’t exactly a battleground in this global war. But we fully expect old-timers to write in with a full, detailed explanation.
BRIEFING BREATHER
Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.
STATEWIDE – Last week, no one had a clue about “omicron.” Now it’s the buzz of all media, foreign and domestic, as health officials announce it is quickly coming here, in yet another unwelcomed, tired remake of COVID 19. There are plenty of ways to whip up hysteria for a new pandemic variant, debating travel restrictions, interacting with the unvaccinated, and how, exactly, New Jerseyans will be protected from all this “unknown.” And, with knowing not much else and the latest public health emergency, let’s just revert to the same message: Get vaccinated, wash hands, wear masks, etc.
STATEWIDE – New Jersey’s drunks, preparing for yet another weekend of boozing and high hopes of arriving home in one piece, should be aware of the annual DWI crackdown, beginning Friday. Just as the drunks plan to spread their holiday cheer, and then recklessly attempt to get behind the wheel, police departments in the state are planning additional DWI checkpoints. The “Drive Sober or Get Pulled Over” campaign runs through Jan. 1. And it’s not just a catchy slogan, as 106 law enforcement agencies are receiving a total of $633,000 in grants just to nab you. Last year, the campaign generated 590 DUI arrests. Still want to get plastered? Say home; drink with a neighbor.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
YORKSHIRE DALES – Closing time is out the window at Britain’s highest altitude pub, cut off from the world by a blizzard. There are 61 people who awoke yesterday at the Tan Hill Inn in Yorkshire Dales, 270 miles north of London, unable to leave since the storm hit on Friday. There’s apparently only so much booze one person can consume, we’ve heard, so the manager organized movies, a quiz night and karaoke for the stranded guests. Also stranded was the band on Friday night, who ended up with the longest, ongoing gig in their careers. While waiting for the roads to clear, the manager said the customers were “in really good spirits.” Yep, like gin, vodka and whiskey.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
Welcome to the Jacksonville Jaguars, announced this day in 1993.
WORD OF THE DAY
Zarf – [zarf] – noun
Definition: A small, ornamental metal holder used for coffee cups that lack a handle.
Example: I usually remove the zarf from my hot Starbucks cup because real men can handle pain.
WIT OF THE DAY
“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born into it.”
-George Bernard Shaw
BIDEN BLURB
“Everyone eligible for the booster shot should get the booster shot immediately upon being eligible. That is the minimum that everyone should be doing. We always talk about whether this is about freedom, but I think it’s a patriotic responsibility to do that.”
-Joe Biden
WEATHER IN A WORD
Blech