The Jaffe Briefing - July 26, 2021

ROSELLE PARK – The story of a local woman with vulgar anti-Biden signs appeared to be over after a municipal court judge sided with basic logic and decency, ordering her to remove them from her fence. But now the ACLU is involved, for some reason, representing the resident in this senseless legal battle that has grabbed the attention of CNN. Mayor Joseph Signorello told the national news network that the borough has no interest in ratcheting up this legal battle, NJ.com reports, as the case sits in Superior Court and could then get escalated to the New Jersey Supreme Court on appeal. You may recall a judge ordered the woman to remove three anti-Biden signs with the F-word on her fence or face a $250-a-day fine. The signs are still up and the meter is ticking, as of last Thursday. It’s amazing the ACLU’s resources are not better spent elsewhere, but all the potential media coverage is certainly alluring.

STATEWIDE – Legal Services of New Jersey is out with a must-read report for any lawmaker, showing what it really costs for a family of four to live in New Jersey. Of course, the numbers swing wildly based on where you live in the state. The lowest “survival salary” for a family with one preschooler and one school-aged child in Cumberland County is $64,000. The number jumps all the way to $98,000 in Somerset County, the Philly Inquirer reports. That bare minimum number shows what families need without having to, say, “We can pay the rent, but no one is getting a winter coat this year.” These numbers – at $76,205 in Union County and $83,168 in Middlesex County, for example – are the lowest a family can earn while still maintaining dignity and not requiring government support. It’s an important benchmark, especially as politicians weigh which public expenditures are really, truly needed.

WESTFIELD - You see plenty of boring and forgettable political ads that all seem to say the same thing. And then you see an ad like this from Assemblyman Jon Bramnick that really raises the entire game. Click here. It's worth it.

BRIEFING BREATHER

On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year.

TRENTON – It is Bizarro world, in which the story is no longer about how completely and hopelessly broke the state pension system has become, and how it will further drag taxpayers into a deep, gaping, blinding abyss. Rather, NJ.com is talking about all the rosy returns in our suddenly fun and frolicky pension fund. There’s great relief among public workers, as the fund returned nearly 25% in the first 11 months of the fiscal year, and seems to be heading for its best year in nearly 25 years. The fund earned a quick $2 billion between April and May, up to $92.7 billion, as the stock market churns in its own magical way. Happy days are here again?

TRENTON – Middle schoolers may finally get the meaning of that Depression-era photo, above, as Gov. Phil Murphy signed a law requiring them to study civics lessons – at least two-quarters worth – starting in September. It’s all in honor of Laura Wooton, a late New Jerseyan, known as the longest-serving poll worker in the United States. The Record reports Wooton was a volunteer poll worker in Mercer County for 79 consecutive years, beginning during FDR’s presidency until she died two years ago, at age 98. Wooton clearly knew her responsibility as an American citizen, and hopefully generations of middle schoolers will now know, too.

IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS

SOUTHFIELD, Mich. – There’s not a lot of humor these days at Facebook, which took its hate speech standards to a whole new level by blocking the account of one Metro Detroit resident. And her scandalous post: “Why are men so dumb?” That statement, responding to a meme about how women will notice two shades of purple nail polish, but not men, earned her a 24-hour suspension to the platform. “At first I thought it was a joke (and) I’m like yeah right I’m blocked…what? But it was real, for sure,” she posted. We must ask: Why is Facebook so dumb?

HANOVER, PA. – Donations make a difference. Especially if the donation happens to be classic Nintendo video games. Someone was clearly not paying attention, as they dropped off 27 cartridges in their original packaging at the Goodwill, assuming it was just a bunch of junk. (Thanks, mom.) Goodwill put the games up for auction, beginning at $9.99, ultimately netting more than $30,000, along with a vintage gaming system that sold for another $650, according to a Goodwill press release, with plenty of gushing. Big sellers were “Low G Man,” “Metal Gear,” and our personal favorite, “Bad News Baseball.”

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

Among Benjamin Franklin’s many, many jobs was serving as the nation’s first Postmaster General, a position he accepted on this day in 1775.

WORD OF THE DAY

Natant – [nety-nt] – adjective

Definition: swimming, floating

Example: Did you see all those natant jellyfish down the shore this weekend?

WIT OF THE DAY

''My choice early in life was either to be a piano-player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference.''

-Harry S. Truman

BIDEN BLURB

“I can die a happy man never having been president of the United States of America.” 

-Joe Biden 

WEATHER IN A WORD

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