The Jaffe Briefing - January 29, 2021
ON THE RAILS – Now, here’s a sign that things may be returning to normal. Like a typical day ending in y, the big news this morning is that NJ Transit was reporting one-hour delays into Manhattan during rush hour, throwing commuters into their latest tizzy. The issue was apparently signal problems going into the Hudson River tunnels, or whatever, and the rail agency is cross-honoring tickets on PATH trains, or whatever, while Midtown direct service was being diverted to Hoboken, or whatever. Whatever the case: ah… normalcy!
NOT NEW YORK – Well, there could be some good news for at least some New York-bound commuters, for those who happen to work at Condé Nast. The struggling magazine empire – a high-profile tenant in the uber-expensive World Trade Center – is now eyeballing a move to the northern New Jersey waterfront, Crain’s reports. The company wants roughly 400,000 square feet of office space split between Manhattan and here. Condé Nast, which has the same owner as The Star-Ledger, now blows ridiculous cash on 1 million square feet of office space at One World Trade. Cut the wasteful expense, move it to all available space in Jersey and hire more reporters. You’re welcome.
BRIEFING BREATHER
At least 9 million other people in the world share your birthday.
TRENTON – Sen. Gerry Cardinale has been a Statehouse fixture longer than some of its plumbing. Now, this Republican lawmaker since 1979 faces a serious challenge from his own running mate, Assemblywoman Holly Schepisi. Cardinale, 86, explains that “Holly is personally ambitious,” telling New Jersey Globe he’s been asking GOP leaders in Bergen and Passaic counties if it’s time to hang up his wingtips. “So far, I haven’t (found) anyone dissatisfied with what I’m doing. They’re not pleased to have (this) fight,” he says. Schepisi says she only wants “what’s best for the future of our party.” If she loses to Cardinale in the March GOP convention, she could try again in the June primary, but she’d forfeit re-election to her sixth Assembly term. Cardinale shrugs: “Once you take the plunge, you take the plunge. She’s going to take the plunge.”
STATEWIDE – Illicit ‘speakeasies’ are on the rise, the result of pandemic restrictions that closed or limited hours at people’s usual watering holes. Unlike Prohibition-era hideaways where patrons imbibed bootleg liquor in hushed tones, today’s after-hours pop-up parties aren’t quiet. They get advertised on handbills, and feature DJ’s, boisterous music and dancing. There’s no modern-day Eliot Ness, but police raids are on the rise. The most recent, in Newark this week where cops found 50 unmasked patrons boozing it up inside a soccer club outfitted with illegal gambling machines. NJ.com says there have been at least a dozen similar raids since October at warehouses and empty storefronts in Irvington, Paterson, Trenton and elsewhere. Just shows, some knuckleheads aren’t untouchable.
TOMS RIVER - It looks like it will be 19 degrees or so on Saturday night. And that is some important information for Councilman Terrance Turnbach, vowing to sleep outside to highlight the struggle of the area homeless, the Asbury Park Press reports. And he is hoping the Ocean County Board of Commissioners joins him. His plea: The county needs a building that could be used for transitional housing. So, hopefully commissioners can all come out and snuggle under thermal blankets, as they chat about this pressing issue and plan for this new facility. Perhaps the councilman can sweeten the pot with some cocoa.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
IDAHO FALLS, Idaho – Famed CBS newsman Walter Cronkite is somewhere in heaven this morning, reading today's Heaven News and stunned at what us people on Earth now consider “news.” Case in point: AP is actually reporting on an Idaho man who became famous on TikTok after singing “Dreams” by Fleetwood Mac and drinking cranberry juice while longboarding. He is now being enshrined in the Museum of Idaho. And why? Dunno. But the man, who calls himself “Doggface,” signed a bottle of Ocean Spray cranberry juice for the museum during an actual press event, the Post-Register reported. In exchange: free museum passes. Here’s the video, loved by 12.5 million people.
BAR GRAMMAR
A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
The “axis of evil” became a real thing on this day in 2002, when President Bush coined the phrase during his State of the Union in describing Iraq, Iran and North Korea.
WORD OF THE DAY
Canaliculus – [can·a·lic·u·lus] – noun
Definition: A small canal in the body.
Example: Taking a bath? Don’t forget to clean out that canaliculus!
WIT OF THE DAY
“Ireland is the old sow that eats her farrow.”
-James Joyce
BIDEN BURB
“James Joyce was said to have told a friend that when it comes his time to pass, when he dies, he said, `Dublin will be written on my heart.’ Well, excuse the emotion, but when I die Delaware will be written on my heart.”
-Joe Biden
WEATHER IN A WORD
Freezing