The Jaffe Briefing - January 15, 2019
TRENTON - If you happen to have plenty of spare time during your workday, at, say, 2 p.m., tune in today for Gov. Phil Murphy's first-ever "State of the State" speech. There's some of the same old glaring stuff, like pension debt, issues with NJ Transit and our outrageous property taxes. And there's new stuff, like recreational marijuana and a $15 minimum wage, two issues that were at the forefront of 2018, but never materialized. There've been unpleasantries, like a rape allegation against a campaign worker and a "dark money" group operated by close Murphy allies that refuse to disclose their donors. All who attend the speech, and the others who stream it, will certainly be weighing how it has benefitted New Jersey to have its first progressive governor in 50 years or so. Has Murphy changed your life?
WEST LONG BRANCH - Party on! That's the message at Monmouth University today, with word the university is reinstating fraternities and sororities - after four months of double secret probation - following widespread instances of hazing, boozing, drugging and flunking. Over those long, cruel months, members of the university's Greek system were actually spotted in classrooms, purchasing a used book or two and appearing on campus before 2 p.m. on some afternoons. And, in the most startling news, one faculty member reported seeing an individual adorned with Greek letters in the vicinity of the campus library, although unclear if this apparent student attempted access. Monmouth officials have instituted plenty of conditions for these 700 Greek students, such as requiring members to maintain a quite unimpressive 2.25 GPA, beginning next fall. School officials are calling this "a reset," while Greek members plan their triumphant return. Dilly-Dilly.
TRENTON - Call it "optimistic," as one ticked-off New Jerseyan is working to recall Gov. Phil Murphy. The Somerset County woman is enthusiastically circulating a petition that would remove the governor, in which she only needs 25 percent of registered voters in the state. She tells NJ 101.5 that the state will soon be a "desert," as people flock elsewhere. As she desperately tries to save her beloved state from certain apocalypse from an obvious madman, she just needs 1,484,358 more signatures by the end of the year. Shouldn't be a problem.
NEWARK - Horizon Blue Cross Blue Shield didn't exactly roll out a miniature sleigh and eight flying reindeers, but it did deliver a bit of Christmas cheer to its customers - checks for hundreds or even thousands of dollars. The money, which went to some 140,000 subscribers, fulfilled a promise the state's largest health insurer made back in February 2018 to divvy up the $150 million refund it received courtesy of President Donald Trump's federal tax reform. This could very well constitute the biggest favor Trump has done for the Garden State. Now, where's that Gateway Tunnel? Read more in today's NJ Spotlight.
CAMDEN - It's a bad idea to threaten, well, anyone. Worse to threaten someone like Sen. Cory Booker, a presumptive presidential candidate. A federal grand jury yesterday indicted a Michigan man for leaving a vulgar voicemail for Booker and threatening to stick a 9-mm handgun in his face. The FBI arrested the 52-year-old suspect after tracing an Oct. 26 cellphone call to Booker's Camden office. The Grand Rapids Press says the caller allegedly said: "Just me and my wife and we got guns a-blazin' pal. I got a nine millimeter I'll put in your f--k--' face, you m-----f-----. You wanna, you wanna challenge me?" The suspect is now facing five years in federal prison, a $250,000 fine and a lifetime sentence of watching MSNBC.
TRENTON - A hundred million dollars here, a hundred million dollars there. Yawn, is there really a difference? Apparently, that is real money down in Trenton, where state officials are a wee bit concerned that the state is off $680 million from its end-of-year projections for 2018. NJ 101.5 reports the state's major revenues are running 2.1 percent ahead of their pace from one year earlier. Sounds great, except that the state budget is counting on 7.5 percent growth. How inconvenient. The state needed an extra $680 million to stay on target, but, hey, cheer up, kiddo, the fiscal budget year isn't over until June 30.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
WICHITA FALLS, Texas - Just when you think Walmart can't get any classier, now there's a story of a shopper who spent three hours driving around the parking lot on an electric shopping cart while guzzling wine out of a Pringles can. Although many admired her ingenuity, Walmart officials may be considering a lifetime ban. Police tell the Times Record News that officers responded to a report of a suspicious person around 9 a.m. Friday at the Walmart. (That's around 125 miles northwest of Dallas, near some unknown state that authorities referred to as "Oklahoma.") Assume plenty of hootin' and hollerin' from this lass, who police later found in a nearby restaurant. She was told not to return to Walmart and may ultimately forgo opportunities to purchase 50-pound sacks of $9 dog food.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was this day in 2016 that video surfaced of an all-girl trio's bubble-gum-pop song honoring Donald Trump. The preteen "USA Freedom Kids" - clad as patriotic cheerleaders - debuted "Freedom's Call" before 10,000 Trump fanatics packed into the Pensacola Bay Center. Among the eye-popping lyrics: "Enemies of freedom face the music, come on boys take 'em down/President Donald Trump knows how to make America great/Deal from strength or get crushed every time."
Slate Magazine assumed we would all soon be singing this ditty "in our mandatory labor camps." On Twitter it got called "disturbing and creepy," "something out of North Korea," and "a reminder of Hitler youth," among a slew of unprintable things.
WORD OF THE DAY
Incarnadine - (in-KAR-nah-dine) - noun
Definition: Having the scarlet color of flesh
Example: Let's assume there's a new tanning bed in the Oval Office, keeping the President's cheeks nice and incarnadine.
WIT OF THE DAY
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"If you think you are too small to make as difference, try sleeping with a mosquito."
- Dalai Lama
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WEATHER IN A WORD
Shiny