The Jaffe Briefing - July 26, 2017
OUR TAKE ON THE NEWS IN NEW JERSEY
WOODCLIFF LAKE - It looks like Lt. Gov. Kim Guadagno is poised to announce a Bergen County mayor as her running mate - Woodcliff Lake Mayor Carlos Rendo. Don't know him? Well, he is a Cuban-American attorney, an early supporter of Guadagno and someone with the ability to raise money, Politico reports. Sounds like a guy New Jersey looks forward to meeting, as he appears unknown beyond the world of suburban Bergen County. Why wouldn't Guadagno pick someone with immediate statewide recognition that can raise all ships? But, with her sagging poll numbers, perhaps the Woodcliff Lake mayor, with only 5,700 constituents, is her best bet, with the hopes and prayers that plenty of Cubans vote.
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL - Politics continues to get interesting, as the Green Party has selected a famously fired adjunct professor as its Lieutenant Governor candidate. You may recall that Lisa Durden was bounced from Essex County College after some controversial comments on Fox News regarding the Black Lives Matter movement. The Newark woman is partnering with Seth Kaper-Dale, the pastor of the Reformed Church of Highland Park, on what promises to be an interesting campaign. Click below to learn more about who could become the next Lieutenant Governor.
STATEWIDE - Guns and churches don't mix. Well, except for this Friday and Saturday, when you can surrender your firearms for cold hard cash at a church in each of our three biggest, most gun-ridden cities. You also get amnesty and, hey, maybe divine forgiveness. The Attorney General's Office is buying back guns, no questions asked, at Antioch Baptist Church, Camden; Greater Abyssinian Baptist Church, Newark; and Friendship Baptist Church, Trenton. Going rates are: $100 for rifles, $120 for handguns, and $200 for assault weapons. Oddly, the AG set a three-gun limit. So, hang on to the rest of your illegal stockpile until next time.
PATERSON - Optimistic, and maybe a tad too prophetic, is how embattled Mayor Jose "Joey" Torres chose to deliver his a 50-minute State of the City address Tuesday. Focusing on his success at cutting taxes, lowering crime and planning for $400 million in new development, Torres avoided any mention of the well-publicized, six-count corruption indictment he faces. Near the end of his speech, the Paterson Press says, Torres got all philosophical, saying: "Success always comes at a price. My father taught me that a person can pay now and play later, or play now and pay later. Either way, he is going to pay."
WATCHUNG - Nothing says "kick-ass man cave" like your very own mechanical bull. Now, you can be the biggest buckaroo in the neighborhood with the "Buck-Off Bull" from the shuttered Colorado Café. The nightclub's herky-jerky, well-worn, ride-on bull goes up for auction July 31 along with cheesy neon beer signs, saddle-style bar stools, and other kitschy cowboy décor. Colorado Café was a Somerset County hot spot for two decades, until rowdy hoedowns took a popularity nosedive. Now, everything must go. So mosey on over.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
TACOMA, WA - A dump truck carting dough spilled its contents all over the Washington interstate on Monday. It was a scene you knead to see to believe, as cops watched piles of dough rise on the hot pavement, while they gleefully took photos. "When you think you've seen it all.... dough!" State Trooper Brooke Bova tweeted with a photo of the accident. She got even more punny, stating, "Whole-y grain Batman! It's messy but it's not a hazard... I'm on a roll."
Whole-y grain Batman! It's messy but it's not a hazard! I'm on a roll. ���� pic.twitter.com/M5ntoirtJG
- Trooper Brooke Bova (@wspd1pio) July 24, 2017
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
Perhaps "You've Got Mail" was first said on this day in 1775, when Congress established the U.S. Post Office and named Benjamin Franklin as the first Postmaster General. The post office was started following the gripes of the ticked-off publisher of the Pennsylvania Chronicle, which needed a reliable way to get his newspaper into the hands of readers.
WORD OF THE DAY
Akimbo - [uh-KIM-bo] - adverb
Definition: Having the hand on the hip and the elbow turned outward
Example: Her arms akimbo, the candidate for lieutenant governor struck a pose at the end of the runway.
WEATHER IN A WORD
Nicer