The Jaffe Briefing - June 2, 2017
OUR TAKE ON THE NEWS IN NEW JERSEY
ON THE RAILS - If you are a commuter who actually wants to get to work on time this summer, NJ Transit has a message for you: Leave extra early. Join the yawning masses who will be spending daybreak this summer on the local train platform, watching the sun rise over the local donut joint, in the hopes of grabbing a train that is not yet delayed, derailed, rerouted or missing. NJ Transit says there will be a whole new round of exciting service disruptions this summer, as major repairs are made at New York's Penn Station, and many trains are sent to Hoboken during peak periods.
ON THE RAILS - But, always positive, we have great news for commuters: it's National Donut Day! It's an annual holiday that dates back to World War I, honoring the women in the Salvation Army who made sugary goodness for the troops. These "Donut Lassies" are long gone, but Donut Day is now, of course, a tremendous marketing opportunity for the donut chains. So, as you simmer over your delayed train today, or whatever else is irking you, stop by Dunkin' Donuts, Duck Donut, Quick Chek, Wawa, Krispy Kreme, or wherever, for a free donut.
TRENTON - Grandma got overrun by a SWAT team, and her family is fuming. Armed to the teeth and tossing flash-bang grenades, tactical officers broke down doors of the wrong Locust Street home last week, scaring the skivvies off a 66-year-old grandmother and a visitor. The woman's son tells The Trentonian both ladies were shoved to the floor, "treated like animals ... humiliated, traumatized and embarrassed." Apologetic police say "an intelligence gap" caused the blunder. This comes just a few weeks after cops mistakenly stormed the wrong Sweets Avenue home in hot pursuit of a gunman. Uh... whoopsies?
IN COURT - Who's on first? ... or at least, who's got first dibs on that classic Abbott and Costello baseball comedy routine? The U.S. Supreme Court says it has more serious matters to consider, so it will not entertain a copyright dispute against creators of the Broadway comedy "Hand of God," the National Law Journal reports. Heirs of Paterson-born Lou Costello and Asbury Park native Bud Abbott claim they own the rights to "Who's On First," but have already lost infringement cases at trial and at the appeals level over 90 seconds worth of "Who's On First" used in the play. Now, is seems, they struck out again.
COLLINGSWOOD - Alec Baldwin does a great impersonation of a blustering real estate tycoon who can snap his fingers and raise millions. And, while Baldwin is just an actor, he still has the magic ability to rake in the bucks, such as the $5.1 million he raised last night for New Jersey Democrats at a fundraiser in Collingswood. Philly.com reports 1,000 people attended the event last night to see America's best-known Trump impersonator, with the proceeds to help fund races across the state. We're talking 120 seats in the state Legislature and, of course, the governor's seat.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
NEW YORK - Kiddies heading to the ballpark can be assured Mr. Met will behave himself. After Mr. Met was caught famously flipping the bird to fans Wednesday night during the team's ugly 7-1 loss to the Brewers, the Mets management says another Mr. Met will be in the lineup for the upcoming games. Apparently, the person in the costume Wednesday night has been fired, or, worse, sent to the Kingsport Mets in Tennessee.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
Bust out the velvet. It was this day in 1977 that New Jersey decided to allow casino gambling in Atlantic City.
WORD OF THE DAY
Dripple - [DRIP-uhl] - verb
Definition: To flow in a small stream or to fall in drops.
Example: The paint drippled down the new casino wall and looked fabulous.
WEATHER IN A WORD
Beauty