The Morning Briefing - December 16, 2016
**The Morning Briefing will run its last issue of the year today, proudly returning Tuesday, Jan. 3, 2017
THANK YOU - The Morning Briefing started five years ago today to give our clients the latest happenings and prove we're working. Of course, we couldn't help but interject some attempted humor, opinion and fun. We began with 425 emails; many other readers have since jumped on. Today's Morning Briefing will reach 18,620 well-informed subscribers. And that's attracted some loyal advertisers. We appreciate all this and the many messages we get from readers - some with accolades, some not. Your colorful responses help make it all worth getting up in the pre-dawn hours to create this, before our regular gig kicks in. So, an extremely sincere "Thank You" and "Happy Holidays" from Jaffe Communications. We look forward to starting this up again Jan. 3, after plenty of eagerly anticipated shuteye.
Now, let's get to it...
SEASIDE HEIGHTS - SantaCon is back! This annual excuse for daytime drinking and debauchery, while wearing a fur-lined red suit, returns here tomorrow for the fourth straight year. SantaCon, which throws back the first beer at noon, is a massive pub crawl among eight bars. Besides getting plastered and yelling "Ho, Ho, Ho" to women, drunken Santas raise money and collect food and toys for the needy. Based on Manhattan's annual event, organizers say, the event is a great way to have fun, toast the holiday and get the beer taps flowing in Seaside Heights in the dead of winter. Read more about SantaCon-Seaside Heights here.
STATEWIDE - Serving jail time and serving on school boards just don't mix. Two Middlesex County lawmakers want school board candidates to certify under oath, before they even start campaigning, that they've never done hard time for first- or second-degree crimes. The Assembly Judiciary Committee has cleared the way for Assemblyman Rob Karabinchak's measure to be put up for a full vote. His pal, Sen. Patrick Diegnan, is pushing an identical bill through the Senate. Karabinchak says a law to prevent those convicted from running is "crucial to protect school children and preserve the sanctity of our school boards." True, but who else can ensure the cafeteria lunch doesn't taste like prison chow?
AT THE ATM - Skim a few bucks here. Skim a few bucks there. Soon you've got real money. That's how federal authorities say a Romanian national stole $7.4 million from scores of bank customers in Middlesex, Monmouth, Ocean, Passaic and Union counties and three other states. While it's one of the largest ATM skimming schemes the feds say they've ever uncovered, its ringleader Robert Mate - a.k.a. "Marcel Varga" or "Chioru" - only faces 57 months in federal prison. In a deal with the U.S. Attorney's Office, he pleaded guilty this week to one measly count of bank fraud. We really hope he's also spilling his guts about his 16 co-conspirators. Otherwise, he's got one heckuva lawyer.
EDISON - Shredded lettuce, onion and tomato slices all went flying in a furious three-minute hoagie-making competition that pitted five township firefighters against five police officers at the recent grand opening of Edison's first Wawa. The contest helped firefighters raise $1,000 for the Saint Barnabas Burn Center while the police team, led by Chief Tom Bryan and Deputy Chief Ron Mieczkowski, raised $1,000 for the N.J. Tourette Syndrome Association. The Edison-Metuchen Sentinel says cops also "walked away with bragging rights" after tossing together 38 hoagies, just one more than their opponents. Watch the video ... then pray none of these guys ever moonlights at your local deli counter.
IN THE MEDIA
EAST RUTHERFORD - It is rare to read stellar journalism in New Jersey these days, as the media just doesn't have the resources anymore to do deep dives and run multiple-day series. And that is why a heap of kudos should be dropped on NJSpotlight, which has been expertly dissecting the mega, mega-mall deal in the Meadowlands. NJSpotlight explains just how little the state will reap from this, how little most of the jobs will pay and, of course, where all the campaign cash went to keep this project churning. As the mall lawyers read everything, we'll stop there. But you can read it all at NJSpotlight.com.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
WILTON, CT - At like $25 a haircut, the barber industry is big business in such upscale towns as Wilton. And perhaps that is why an 80-year-old barber felt he had absolutely no choice but to keep jamming the front lock of a competing shop that opened 100 yards away. The Connecticut Post reports how Agron's Barbershop began having problems in August, with a broken key jammed in the lock, then a toothpick jammed in there, again and again. Surveillance video on Dec. 4 shows the old geezer doing the deed. Maybe it's time for the octogenarian to retire early.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was this day in 1994 that Davy Jones was charged with DWI. The cop ignored his lame excuse, in which Jones explained he was "just tryin' to be friendly," and, in desperation, added, "Hey, hey, we're the Monkees!"
WORD OF THE DAY
Hotsy-Totsy [hot-see, tot-see] - adjective
Definition: 1920s slang for about as perfect as you can get
Example: "Hey Joey, this year's SantaCon is gonna be real hotsy-totsy. Plenty of hot dames."
WEATHER IN A WORD
Chilled