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The Morning Briefing - October 5, 2016

TRENTON – There’s finally a tax hike we can stomach. Today, state lawmakers will vote on a 23-cent-per-gallon gas tax to put some money in the Transportation Trust Fund and kickstart long-awaited construction projects. No, this is not about tax-crazy liberals who want you to spend $100 to fill up your hybrid SUV. It’s about the fact that New Jersey has driven itself into such a deep financial hole, after years of good ol’ bi-partisan mismanagement, and we have absolutely no other alternative. Without a strong transportation network, New Jersey loses a competitive edge. And that means we lose corporate investment, jobs, and more rich people to tax. So, yeah, no one wants this long overdue tax hike – the first in 28 years. But at least we can smack some of the travelers from Connecticut who have no choice but to fill up on the New Jersey Turnpike.

WOODBRIDGE – What's school without homework? Total anarchy or totally fun? Students and staff from the Port Reading and Robert Mascenik elementary schools are actively investigating. They're part of a national pilot program to downplay homework, giving kids less after-school “busy work” so they have ample time to play outdoors, do household chores and spend quality time with family. Uh-huh, right. Superintendent Robert Zega told NJ.com: “It's not that there's no homework,” just less emphasis on it. Okay kids, fire up that Xbox and pass the Cheetos ... another hour of “Call of Duty.”

JERSEY CITY – Yet another creepy clown now leers down at motorists. This time, it's a billboard portrayal of Donald Trump as “The Joker,” saying “Dare me” as he gets ready to set off three grenades inside his American flag-lined jacket. The disturbing anti-Trump display, on the rooftop of a six-story self-storage warehouse, is visible to eastbound Newark Avenue motorists coming off Routes 1&9, the Jersey Journal says. It's courtesy of Mana Contemporary, a city-based arts and cultural center, that last month put an oversized, naked Donald Trump statue atop a building near the Holland Tunnel. That statue got stolen. The billboard's probably too huge to cart off, but it is a must-see for tourists.

STATEWIDE – Depending on who you are speaking with, Hurricane Matthew will barrel into New Jersey on Sunday, or head on off to sea. Once again, we are watching some maps and there is a lot of guesswork. NJ.com reports there is this “cone of uncertainty” that now covers the eastern seaboard — from northern Florida to southern New Hampshire. Meanwhile, CBS this morning reports the storm seems to be moving east over the Atlantic, sparing any poor slob who just took the roof off his house for a home renovation. It appears all will be ok, but the excited weatherman wants you to BE WARNED.

EAST BRUNSWICK – Before Kindle or Nook, there were “libraries.” These are public buildings where people go to read magazines, newspapers and books. For free! If you live nearby, wear shoes, and have a library card, you can even take some books home to read. Again, all free! Next year, the East Brunswick Library celebrates its 50th year doing quirky stuff like that. For its golden anniversary, it's hosting a competition for creative youngsters and adults to design fancy, limited edition library cards. There's a Nov. 15th deadline. Here are the rules. Or, rather than go online, perhaps you would like to actually visit this “library.” Just to see if it is real or a fable.

IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS

NEW YORK – OK, we admit. We are a little giddy today. There is glorious playoff baseball for the Mets once again. It’s just one game. We win tonight, we go on. We lose, well, heck we can’t believe we made the wildcard anyway. It all goes down at 8 p.m. at CitiField. Nine innings. Noah Syndergaard vs. Madison Bumgarner. Gladiator vs. gladiator. October baseball once again in Flushing. Let’s savor this while we can.  #LGM

WINDSOR, Vt. – School board members are disgusted, now having to deal with two teachers who scrawled on a new concrete sidewalk, creating $1,500 in damage. Workers told the teachers to back off the wet concrete on Main Street, but then they apparently returned, with alleged giggles, and drew what appeared to be a rat. WCAX-TV reports the teachers at Foundations Upper Valley were actually attempting to draw a dinosaur to “engage students during their walks.” One of the vandals later wrote on her Facebook page that "In retrospect, it was pretty stupid.”  The court date is planned for December, while the over-reactive school dashed off a letter to parents, guardians and community members, saying it does not condone such behavior and is now implementing a “professional improvement plan.” Perhaps there will even be a candlelight vigil.

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

It was this day in 2010 that a team of linguists took an expedition to Arunachal Pradesh, in northeastern India, and discovered a new language known as Koro. A deep sigh is heard by neurotic, over-bearing parents, now seeking tutors for newly-created “Koro 101.”

WORD OF THE DAY

Empyreal [em-pye-REE-ul] - adjective

Definition: Of or relating to the heavens

Example: Indiana Gov. Mike Pence wore a necktie last night of empyreal sapphire blue.

WEATHER IN A WORD

Perfect