The Morning Briefing - August 22, 2016
CARNEYS POINT - If you want to scare the bejesus out of people, be the man who left two military containers marked "projectile" and "communications" near the gas pumps at a Route 140 travel plaza on Saturday night and then drove away. Of course, this prompted a big evacuation of the gas pumps, as well as the Flying J Store and a nearby Denny's, where the bottomless coffee suddenly, and unfairly, became limited. The State Bomb Unit rushed in and luckily there were no explosives. But cops found the guy who left the containers and are eager to officially ask, "What the hell is wrong with you?"
MILLTOWN - This town's iconic smokestack and water tower will soon be the only remnants of the Michelin Tire factory that helped build this tiny Middlesex County burg. Demolition crews are now ripping down the long-abandoned brick buildings - eyesores on Ford Avenue for decades - home to the tire-maker from 1907 until the Great Depression forced its hasty retreat to France in 1930. Owners of the 22-acre site, who face a $3 million federal lien and owe $1 million in unpaid taxes, want to build 350 homes. But, Mayor Eric Steeber tells the Home News Tribune that his tiny town can't afford to build a new school to handle kids from so many more homes. Perhaps the developer will graciously build one?
BAYONNE - Getting hitched at City Hall may no longer be a free wedding gift, courtesy of Bayonne taxpayers. Performing weddings or civil unions, after all, is time consuming for Mayor Jimmy Davis and the city's municipal judges. So, Wednesday the City Council will talk about charging a $150 wedding fee. This is nothing new; they vary widely from town to town. For instance, getting married in Jersey City by a guy who might become governor only costs you $52. Edison Mayor Tom Lankey and Hamilton Mayor Kelly Yaede perform weddings for free, but they encourage donations to local charities. Weddings are pricier in Pennsauken, with a $130 fee slapped on top of the $28 license. Add $20 mileage if the mayor has to drive somewhere and tack on another $130-$150 for "the mayor's time and effort." If the bride and groom think that's expensive, try marriage.
STATEWIDE - No question, New Jersey law can be backward and outdated. Yet an easy way to crawl into the 21st century would be to allow supermarkets to sell beer and wine. A proposed state law has been batted around by the Legislature in recent years, but hasn't gotten the obvious attention it deserves. Maybe this can help: The Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board is now permitting supermarkets to sell wine, ending a woefully outdated Prohibition-era law. Sales are also allowed in sub shops, with such classic names as "Big Woody's" in Allentown and the "Super Sub & Six Pak" in Dubois. Time to change the law here; New Jersey refuses to lose to Big Woody.
EAST RUTHERFORD - Only in New Jersey is it "news" when Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band roll their tour buses into the Meadowlands. But, as every news outlet from Cape May to High Point is reporting, the official band of New Jersey is back for some summer shows. Tickets go on sale today for shows tomorrow, Thursday and August 30, with grand assumptions that more shows will be added when these easily sell out. Get ready for the stories of people who have gone to a Springsteen show like 200 times, those who got engaged at one, those who were conceived at one and those who have zero interest and are, therefore, officially deemed "outcasts," "weird," or from Delaware.
IN THE MEDIA
SAN DIEGO, CA. - Watch out ladies: Donald Trump wants to ban tampons! Well, at least that's what a San Diego-based author and trickster recently managed to convince a bunch of young voters. Insisting that America's say-anything GOP presidential nominee is "anti-tampon and pro-maxi pad," Mark Dice caught voter reactions on his latest satiric video. He previously got people to sign petitions to help Karl Marx (yep, the long-dead socialist) become Hillary Clinton's running mate and Dice convinced people to offer on-camera condolences for recently-deceased Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. the "first African American astronaut to walk on the moon." His point: People are grossly misinformed and voluntarily stupid. Watch here.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
The former boss got the last laugh on George Orwell on this day in 2012, as the British Broadcasting Corp. refused to build a statue of the late author and former BBC producer, who quit in 1943 by writing: "for some time past I have been conscious that I was wasting my time and the public money on doing work that produces no results."
WORD OF THE DAY
Kakistocracy [kack-is-TOCK-ra-cy] - noun
Definition: A government under the control of the least-qualified or worst sort of people.
Example: America may soon say goodbye to democracy and hello to kakistocracy.
WEATHER IN A WORD
Radiant.