The Morning Briefing - July 11, 2016
IN THE CLASSROOM – Maybe it's the mediocre salaries. Maybe it's the years of hearing Gov. Chris Christie criticize, vilify and demonize teachers. Maybe it’s all the lead poisoning. For whatever reason, fewer New Jersey high school seniors want to be teachers, according to a survey from American College Testing (ACT) Inc. Moreover, the dwindling few are not in top of the class themselves, scoring lower-than-average grades, especially in math and science, N.J. Advance Media reports. So, on the bright side, future teachers won't be able to figure out how their benefits package keeps shrinking.
BARNEGAT – Town officials want to unload a nice condo in a bad neighborhood. At just $65,000, it should be a real steal. Here's the hitch: It's smack in the middle of the town's crime-plagued Settler's Landing condo complex. Barnegat bought the three-bedroom corner unit last year, when the former mayor had a brilliant idea to turn it into a police substation to give cops more visibility in the area. New Mayor John Novak scuttled the substation, planning to deploy a mobile police task force and use “the element of surprise” to crack down on crime. Novak told the Southern Ocean Times that taxpayers shouldn't lose money on the deal: “We’re certainly going to recoup our cost and maybe make a few dollars.”
STATEWIDE – In other real estate news: Not long ago, you could buy a home in New Jersey and watch its value skyrocket under your stunned eyes. But NJ 101.5 reports that if you happened to buy a home between 2005 and 2010, it is now likely worth less than you bought it for. (Not everyone can be a Trump.) Real estate prices through most of the state are now stuck where they were in 2004. But, remember, if Manhattan continues to become increasingly unaffordable, people will ultimately flock to the suburbs. So, keep supporting those local schools, maybe build a park or two, and sit tight.
LAKEWOOD – Come for the fastballs, stay for the furballs. That was the hope of the Lakewood Blue Claws on Saturday, luring fans over the weekend to the ballpark by allowing them to bring cats. The marketing department had fun with this one, renaming Saturday at the park as “CATurday.” Unamused players were even given new uniforms, featuring dozens of orange, black and gray cat faces. (If that’s not enticement to hit over .300 and get the heck out of Lakewood, nothing is.) The jerseys will be auctioned for the team's charity. Cats were admitted with a $2 Paw Pass. Everyone sang “Take MEOW Out to the Ballgame,” and no CATastrophes were reported. OK, we’re done.
LONG BRANCH – There’s a popular video game called “Five Nights at Freddy’s,” featuring a pizzeria called “Freddie’s Fazbear Pizza.” And there’s a family-owned pizza joint in Long Branch known as “Freddie’s Restaurant and Pizzeria.” The Asbury Park Press says the real, live pizzeria is being slammed with phone calls – upwards of 200 an hour – from zit-faced kids across the world who are asking if Freddie’s is the real deal. In response, the pizza place has needed to add additional phone lines and re-shifted the workforce to handle the barrage of phone calls. "I've never seen anything like this," says one fed-up waitress appropriately named Edna. “It's very annoying. You try to do your job, and you keep picking the phone up."
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL – If Chris Christie's job commitment wasn't already questionable, it wouldn't be so noticeable when our governor drops everything to beat a path to Donald Trump's side. Today, Christie postponed a visit to Fair Lawn to make another pitch for his ludicrous new school-funding formula. Instead, Christie joins the presumptuous GOP presidential nominee in Virginia Beach, Va., where Trump is talking “veterans reform” to a bunch people who actually served their country in uniform. Okay, so maybe going to Fair Lawn isn't a huge priority for Christie. After all, his so-called “Fairness Formula” would give that district an 810-percent increase state aid and lower tax bills by an average $2,220, The Record reports. Christie can deliver that good news anytime. But, lining up his next gig – as chief-of-staff, attorney general, or secretary of bluster – seems to be his top priority. And, he's got to do it right now.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
LUCKNOW, India – There may be a lot of luck now in Lucknow, as hundreds of thousands of people jostle for space today to plant 50 million trees over 24 hours, hoping to shatter a world record. As we all know, Pakistan holds the current record of 847,275, set in 2013. But the people of Lucknow are squarely focused on the task, bringing in more than 800,000 students, lawmakers, government officials, housewives and volunteers to get their hands dirty. Every smidge of roadside, highway, rail track and forest tract will be the home to new samplings by this time tomorrow.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
Great minds think alike on this day in 1988, when Mike Tyson hires Donald Trump as a business advisor.
WORD OF THE DAY
Ossify (AH-suh-fye) – verb
Definition: To become hardened in one’s way
Example: It’s hopeful that some of the polarizing positions Presidential candidates take to win primary elections don’t ossify into the general platform of the campaign.
WEATHER IN A WORD
Beauty.