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The Morning Briefing - June 22, 2016

TRENTON – If Gov. Chris Christie is desperate for relevancy during his last 18 months, he’s certainly found the right issue to get everyone enraged: Dismantling the decades-old school aid formula. The governor thinks the state should pay the same amount of money per kid per year – equal to $6,599. Christie just took out a pencil and paper, and divided the $9.1 billion spent annual among every K-12 student in the state. So, 30 years of the same education funding would go out the window. No longer would billions more be spent in the cities and other under-performing districts, where there are more children with special needs, living in poverty, and speaking other languages. Newark would get what Short Hills gets; Paterson and Alpine would be on par. Holy crap. This would be an epic battle, affecting millions of people, with Christie right where he wants to be: In the middle.

TRENTON – My God, this blockbuster idea merits another Morning Briefing item. For Gov. Chris Christie to vaporize the state’s education formula, he is promising that 75 percent of school districts in the state would get more aid, fueling the “haves” and “have-nots” into an epic battle of parity. The governor is quick to fan flames, noting his plan would get places like Fair Lawn another 815 percent in aid, while Wood-Ridge would reap 800 percent. Property taxes would drop by thousands of dollars in such wealthier towns, where people actually have the money to pay for large homes and leafy grounds. But the money has to come from somewhere, right? And what would life look like in, say, Newark, when funding evaporates and the cash is sent to the suburbs?

TRENTON – Such a story is worth more than two items. Let’s keep going. So, good news for the cities: Gov. Chris Christie can’t just unilaterally decide to rob Peter to pay Paul. He needs a constitutional amendment on the 2017 ballot, and is planning to spend the summer talking to residents about how this is a winning plan. Expect him to spend his summer in the wealthiest enclaves in the state, as he would be fileted like a flounder in the cities, trying to explain to furious Democrats, labor unions, teachers and parents how his plan is constitutional, fair and not completely disastrous for them.

TRENTON – Sorry, gotta keep going. So, in making his presentation in the safe confines of Hillsborough High School, Gov. Chris Christie is quick to point out that the state has dropped $97 billion on 31 poorer school districts in the last 30 years, yet the graduation rates among those districts are still rock bottom in the state. Yet the remaining 546 school districts received $88 billion over that same time, with much, much better results. The governor is right in arguing that throwing more money at a problem is not the solution. But, other than the state funding, these poor districts don’t have many other funding sources. So, as Christie bangs the proverbial fist on the podium and calls it all “an immoral waste of hard-earned money,” how do we give these kids a fighting chance to get a fair and equitable education? Or, for the blind sake of fairness, do we just ignore their failure and sacrifice the potential?

TRENTON – Oh, just one more. As the Democrats control the state Legislature, it’s very doubtful that such a controversial plan from a lame-duck Republican governor will gather any steam. But the shortsightedness and, well, cruelty of the plan must be noted. In a short-term effort to gain the love and adoration of tax-weary, chardonnay-sipping suburbanites, such a dangerous proposal promises a generation of discarded children, educated in schools that could barely afford teachers. And once these kids fail, suburbia will ultimately pay for them, in the form of greater welfare, social services and incarceration. So, sure, Wood-Ridge taxpayers would get a property tax break. Thank you, Governor. But, in the end, at what cost?

FLEMINGTON – Be careful who you vote for: They just might win. Especially, if it's yourself. That's the lesson a 26-year-old local man is learning after he wrote in his own name for multiple offices on the June ballot. Now, Harry Gerdes has a seat on the local Democratic Committee and he's got a pretty good shot at being named by the Democrats to fill a vacancy on the six-member Borough Council, Politico reports. This year, as in previous elections, Gerdes says: “Kind of as a joke, I write myself into every open seat for local elections.” Well, after facing grumpy, irritated residents at a few late-night council meetings, he just might think the joke is on him.

HACKENSACK – It's out with the old; in with the new for Bergen County Republicans. Former Assemblyman Paul DiGaetano emerged from retirement and was chosen to replace Bob Yudin as GOP chairman last night after a caustic intraparty campaign. Republicans are fed up with losses at the polls during Yudin's eight-year tenure, costing them control of the county executive’s office, the sheriff’s post and all but one freeholder seat, The Record reports. The heat is now on for DiGaetano, who won with 539-274 votes, to turn things around with six county-level posts on the Nov. 8 ballot. The last time DiGaetano, then a 14-year assembly veteran, ran for public office was 2005, when he placed a distant sixth in the Republican gubernatorial primary, behind Douglas Forrester.

AT HOME – Think Junior's old bedroom might be the “man cave” you've always wanted? Think again. Millennials are living at home far longer than they have since the 1880s, a new Pew Research Center study says. Nearly 40 percent of people ages 18 to 34 – most of them male – still get their meals cooked and laundry done by parents, grandparents, or other relatives rather than marrying, shacking up, or finally moving out on their own. Sociologist Andrew J. Cherlin told The New York Times some are saving up for their own digs, but the growing statistics may also show a growing “inability to become real adults … some young adults have that failure-to-launch syndrome.” And besides, Mom still uses that good fabric softener. 

IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS

ATLANTA – Anyone who is proud of stealing a six-pack from the liquor store would be quickly shamed by the guys who somehow made off with 3,300 cases of beer from the SweetWater Brewing Co. Two refrigerated trailers were stolen in the pre-dawn darkness yesterday, AP reports. The trailers were later found, but missing is 78,500 bottles of beer. Police are now following any leads, especially in areas with reports of excessive urination and burping.

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

It was this day in 1990 that Florida banned people from wearing thong bathing suits in public.  Good news; of course, depending on who is wearing one.

WORD OF THE DAY

Somnolent – (SAHM-nuh-lunt) – adjective

Definition: Drowsy

Example: His somnolent voice made it impossible to stay awake in the meeting.

WEATHER IN A WORD

Sun.