The Morning Briefing - April 6, 2016
TEANECK – The turkeys of Teaneck now have a new opponent – air horns. Town leaders are investing in 20 air horns in the ongoing battle with roving turkeys. Residents plagued with these aggressive birds – who have been pecking at cars, prompting traffic jams and even flying through a kitchen window – simply need to call over to town hall to pick up their very own air horn. State officials say these turkeys tend to calm down over the summer and likely are nowhere to be seen when the calendar flips to Thanksgiving.
CRANFORD – How the heck did we not hear about the “University of Northern New Jersey?” This bogus school has been around since 2012 with its own website, it's own Facebook page, and an official seal featuring the Latin motto “Humanus, Scientia, Integritas.” Perhaps its mascot was “The Fightin’ Feds,” as the entire university was fake, set up in a very real Cranford office building by the Homeland Security Department. Yesterday, the feds announced the results of its sting: 21 people – including one from Bergen County and four from Middlesex County – who recruited foreign students to a school they knew didn’t really exist. More than 1,000 students paid highfees and were allowed to stay in the country. But, even with all this promotion for “UNNJ,” it is amazing no one seemed to know it existed for four years.
MOUNT HOLLY – In more bogus news, a local woman admitted that, yeah, she promoted a Sheryl Crow concert. And, yeah, she spread the show all over Facebook and, yeah, she booked vendors for the concert and, yeah, she sold a bunch of tickets. But, as the Burlington County Times notes, there was no concert. The fake concert promoter is now looking at some real probation for the next five years, as well as $20,000 to $30,000 in restitution.
NEWARK – The festering battle between Uber and Newark will spill into a City Council meeting today, as hundreds of Uber drivers are planning to pack the place to protest the latest effort by the city to squeeze some money out of them, CBS reports. You may recall Mayor Ras Baraka has been threatening to tow Uber and Lyft drivers who pick up customers at Penn Station or the airport without a city license to do so. Now, he wants these drivers to pay hefty fees to Newark. Uber says there are about 2,000 drivers who do business in Newark and plans to have plenty of them at City Hall at 12:30 p.m. to tear into the proposal, claiming it is just a money grab and appeasement of cab companies that have been paying city fees for years. Uh, yes.
TRENTON – Gov. Chris Christie has vetoed the so-called Millionaire’s Tax five times already. Perhaps that is why Democrats won’t be rehashing the issue as negotiations heat up for the proposed $34.8 billion budget, which somehow needs to be mashed together by July 1. Of course, that big, nagging question lingers: Where will the state find that $1.6 billion needed for the Transportation Trust Fund? It’s still nearly bankrupt with no solution on how to pay for needed road and bridge repairs. Apparently, we can’t whisper the words “gas tax.”
TRENTON – If you can fight for our country, why can’t you fight in our state Legislature? That is the thinking behind a proposed bill that would allow 18-year-olds to serve in the Assembly and Senate. No clue how a teen can amass the political machine and cash to win one of these coveted seats, but perhaps this is more about making a point. Assemblyman Tim Eustace put forward the constitutional amendment yesterday, which would reduce the minimum service age from 21. Unclear if this idea has any legs, Politico notes, as no comment has been made yet from Assembly Speaker Vincent Prieto.
EDISON – Middlesex County business leaders will head on down to the Pines Manor at 6 p.m. to recognize “Community Leaders of Distinction,” an award handed out by the Middlesex County Regional Chamber of Commerce. Among those recognized at tonight’s awards dinner include Perth Amboy Mayor Wilda Diaz and New Brunswick’s State Theatre, proving that leadership can take the form of both flesh and blood and brick and mortar. To register, click here.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
COLESVILLE, N.Y. – One Uber driver learned a valuable lesson: Never let the passenger drive. An Uber driver handed the wheel over to his fare on Saturday so he could get some sleep for the 200-mile drive from Philadelphia to central New York. But as the Uber driver grabbed some shuteye, his fare was clocked at 86 mpg on Interstate 81, prompting a car chase with cops. The real driver awoke, the AP reported, and quickly realized what was going on. The customer crashed the car; and was quickly arrested.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
Who was the first American millionaire and how did he do it? It was John Jacob Astor, a fur trader, who incorporated the American Fur Company on this day in 1808.
WORD OF THE DAY
Borborygmus (bor-bah-RIG-mes) – noun
Definition: A rumbling noise produced by the movement of gas through the intestines.
Example: How embarrassing! Another borborygmus. Whoopsie.