The Morning Briefing - February 5, 2016
PISCATAWAY - Next time Rutgers parents pay tuition bills, they can know their little academics are wading through rigorous courses such as "Underwater Basket Making," a recreation class for novice scuba divers. Held at the Werblin Rec Center pool under the watchful eyes of the Rutgers aquatics team, students and faculty can slip on a mask, a snorkel and scuba gear for a single three-hour session, NJ.com reports. They will also get the training they need to weave a wicker basket underwater. There's no course credit, thank God, but participants walk away with a nifty t-shirt, a wicker basket of distinction, and something to brag about. Who knows? Maybe this can become a Division 1 sport.
TOMS RIVER - "Bomb North Korea!" is the battle cry of Ocean County Freeholder Joseph Vicari, demanding Kim Jong-Un finally return the U.S.S. Pueblo. Irritated over the 46th anniversary of the Pueblo's capture on Jan. 23, 1968, Vicari launched into a public tirade Wednesday, according to the Asbury Park Press. "Either return the ship to the United States or ... we sink it, just destroy the ship right in their harbor," says Vicari. North Korea keeps the Pueblo moored off Pyongyang as a war trophy and tourist attraction. Vicari fired off an angry letter to U.S. Rep. Tom MacArthur, which he contends is now in the hands of North Korean leaders. Hopefully, the North Koreans won't put up their own candidate against Vicari, up for his 13th three-year freeholder term next year.
PATERSON - The city scored $1.2 million in quick cash yesterday, shrewdly taking advantage of a new state law that allows municipal officials to auction off tax liens on abandoned, tax-delinquent properties. The city brought in the state's celebrity auctioneer, Max Spann, to quickly move 71 properties, the Paterson Press reports. The winning bidders can begin foreclosures within 10 days, rather than the traditional two-year waiting period. It is a win-win: The city gets money for the coffers, and gets a chance to pump some life - and tax money - into properties that have sat around. It's the hope every city in the state follows Paterson's lead.
MOONACHIE - Meanwhile, there seems to be absolutely no interest in an investor willing to rescue the Joyce Leslie stores. The Record reports high hopes that someone would buy the bankrupt women's clothing store chain, but there were no takers at auction for the 42 locations. That means there will be plenty of going-out-of-business sales to liquidate all the stores, as the company ends a 65-year run. Hard to imagine that being particularly profitable either. If there was real demand for the clothes, Joyce Leslie would have found a way to survive.
WESTFIELD - In what is huge news for the greater Westfield community, workers will begin demolishing the landmark Trader Joe's this morning. The super-popular store was lost in the blizzard, when the roof partially caved. Company officials vow to rebuild at 155 Elm Street, one of the only locations in the downtown with a prized parking lot. But it means that shoppers are going to have to truck to Millburn over the next few months to buy their two-buck chuck.
TRENTON - Was it a mistake for New Jersey to create a lieutenant governor? NJSpotlight is looking for your opinion, as it marks a decade since the creation of the post. So far, readers don't seem to see the value. There's twenty-eight percent who says it has just allowed Gov. Chris Christie to be elsewhere, "chasing his own political goals." Meanwhile, thirty-eight percent say it is time to scrap the job, as the Senate president can serve as acting governor when necessary. Only 12 percent seem to be reserving judgment. Our take: Any doubt our absentee governor has taken advantage?
MONTVALE - Virtually they seemed like ordinary days at two Bergen County high schools: Doors open, teachers in classrooms, and kitchen workers rattling around in cafeterias. The only thing missing: Virtually 2,000 students. They were home - in comfy sweats and flannel pajamas - virtuously telecommuting to classes on laptops. Tuesday and Wednesday were "virtual school days" for Pascack Hills High School in Montvale and Pascack Valley High School in Hillsdale, the Record reported. This regional school district experimented with a virtual school day during a 2014 blizzard, but state education officials said it didn't legally count since neither school was actually open. This week's trial-run got state blessing, and maybe high marks from students too. Calculus is, after all, more entertaining if you can also binge-watch Netflix.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
BOISE, Idaho - A northern Idaho lawmaker must be a maniac, once again pushing for a specialized license plate depicting a hotly disputed Idaho high school mascot known as the Orofino "Maniac." Of course, mental health groups call it offensive. But this is now deterring Rep. Paul Shepherd of Riggins from pushing legislation. Meanwhile, Orofino Councilwoman Jill Woolsey calls the maniac "a symbol of unbridled enthusiasm and a symbol of overcoming odds," adding "it's about a positive image to win and keep fighting." Maniacs.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
There was a whole lot of shaking on this day in 1981 in Brisbane, Australia, when the largest Jello-O mold was created with 9,246 gallons of watermelon flavored goo. No word if a kangaroo went for a tasty plunge.
WORD OF THE DAY
Sesquipedalian (ses-kwi-pi-DAY-lee-en) - adjective
Definition: Given to using long words
Example: The Morning Briefing has never been particularly sesquipedalian. (Um, except in that last sentence.)