The Morning Briefing - January 9, 2015
BLOOMINGDALE – It took the resources of three police departments to nab a guy caught smoking a joint behind a strip mall. You decide if it seemed a huge waste of resources, as the Butler man led police on a foot chase along the banks of the Pequannock River on Wednesday. The Record reports a cop caught the guy and a buddy smoking in a secluded area behind the mall. One guy surrendered, the other ran off, prompting all all-points bulletin with officers from Bloomingdale, Riverdale and Butler assisting in the search and apprehension of this apparently dangerous threat to public safety. A Riverdale police detective even suffered a knee injury through all this. Was this all worth it?
MONTCLAIR – When parents receive the tuition bill for the spring semester – and figure out how the heck to pay it – they can be assured their cherished ones will soon have a brand-new, $210,000 bronze statue depicting the Montclair State’s red-tailed hawk mascot. After all, how can you expect these students to receive a quality public education (or succeed in life) if they aren’t able to walk by such a statue on their way to class, or to their cars, or to go to their jobs? The Record says half the cash is coming from student fees; the remainder from university funds and about $4,000 is donations. The statue is designed to get everyone all excited about Division III athletics and the school’s football team (if it has one).
STATEWIDE –President Obama wants to somehow make community college free for “everybody who is willing to work for it." Obama plans to formally announce his plan today, and no one seems to have any idea how such a huge expense would be funded. But all this “free” college would mean a huge spike in enrollment in New Jersey colleges, prompting college officials to erect even more mascot statues.
FRANKLINVILLE – Kansas authorities apparently don’t have a sense of humor, finding little amusement in the bogus textbook invoices that apparently a Gloucester County man sent to more than 300 public schools in that state. Kansas Attorney General Derek Schmidt filed a lawsuit, demanding the man pay $634,000 for countless violations of the well-known and well-read Kansas False Claims Act. The AG says his office was filled with complaints from ticked-off school officials, none of whom recall ordering all these books from Jersey.
ATLANTIC CITY — At first, the $2.4 billion Revel was designed as a playground for the rich and famous – an oasis on the Jersey Shore where glamour meets luxury. Now, it may become a water park. The Press of AC reports the Florida developer buying the twice-bankrupt behemoth envisions a $108 million water park, both in and out of the 57-story structure. Such a project would hinge on a high-speed ferry service from Manhattan - certainly good news for all these struggling casinos that want to install payphones in the hopes people forget to take their change.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
SEATTLE – Science meets playoff football tomorrow, as earthquake trackers will be using monitors at Century Link Field to track the expected vibrations from hooting and hollering, Starbucks-infused Seahawks fans. Scientists want to get an idea of what it would be like if a real earthquake hit the city, and there’s apparently no better away to experience a shake than after all the jumping and stomping that goes with a Marshawn Lynch touchdown.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was this day in 1979 that Kmart – the home of bad taste – decides to pull Steve Martin’s comedy album “Let’s Get Small” for being in “bad taste.”