The Morning Briefing - November 13, 2015
FLORENCE – One couple will no longer be on edge, after the Burlington County freeholders have agreed to buy their home that almost toppled into the Delaware River. The Burlington County Times reports the county is buying the house for $282,000, and will likely tear it down and shore up the embankment for cars to safely pass. Or it could be marketed as a home that’s super-duper close to the water.
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL – It is not even 2016, and we’ve already reached the point of over-analysis with this Presidential campaign. Case in point: Political pundits are now debating if the federal plan to provide $10 billion for two rail tunnels under the Hudson River hurts Gov. Chris Christie’s chances to be President. The theory: Early primary voters would somehow be enraged that federal money is being used to invest in major infrastructure improvements in a key gateway that affects millions of people. The theory continues: Somehow, Christie is sopping up federal dollars, when state money should be used. The deal also calls for New York and New Jersey to find $10 billion or so to contribute to this project – or what we assume is more than the entire property value of Iowa and New Hampshire.
BELLMAWR – Maybe Gov. Chris Christie will also be skewered for the fact that New Jersey is now the first state in the nation that has a school permitting medical marijuana for a girl with serious epilepsy. Apparently, according to these rural conservatives, Christie could be pinned as a flaming, reckless, high-flying liberal, after he signed a bill on Monday that requires schools to adopt rules that allow kids with developmental disabilities to consume cannabis. We will now wait for the political pundits to howl from the rooftops.
EAST RUTHERFORD – Besides the mess on the field last night as the Jets lost to Rex Ryan and his Bills, there was another unintended mess for the NFL’s “Color Rush” campaign. For the four Thursday night games between now and the end of the season, both teams will be wearing primary colors. Cool? Right? Well, not if you are color blind. CBS showed what last night’s game looked like with the red and green uniforms if you happen to be color blind. And there’s no way you can tell the teams apart. Hmm. Perhaps the Jets actually won.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
LEXINGTON, Ky. – Here’s a way to feel great about a parking ticket. For the month, Lexington will be accepting cans of donated food, in lieu of money, as part of its “Food for Fines” program. The Lexington Herald-Leader reports that those who donate 10 canned food items will receive a $15 credit on citations. The cans will go to a local food pantry. Fun fact: One expired parking meter ticket could mean two meals for hungry Fayette County families. No, Lexington will not accept your half-eaten can of recalled SpaghettiOs.
FORT DODGE, Iowa – We knew Donald Trump would implode, but he lasted longer than we thought. No longer the established front runner in the bizarre GOP primary, the fangs are out. Last night, he likened Ben Carson's childhood “pathological temper” to the illness of a child molester and berated voters who support him. “How stupid are the people of Iowa?” declared Trump, to the people of Iowa. “How stupid are the people of the country to believe this crap?” Then, he turned to Florida Sen. Marco Rubio, calling him “weak like a baby,” and “not a good poker player because every time he's under pressure he starts to just profusely sweat.” And then there’s Hilary Rodham Clinton, “playing the woman's card, big league.” Is this enough, finally, for the Trump supporters to rethink this guy as “Presidential”?
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
Happy Birthday to the Holland Tunnel! It opened this day in 1927, named after project engineer Clifford Milburn Holland, 41, who died of a heart attack from all the stress of trying to connect New Jersey and New York under the Hudson River.
WORD OF THE DAY
Catachresis (kat-ah-KRE-sis) — noun
Definition: The incorrect use of a word or phrase.
Example: How many times are the Morning Briefing writers going to commit a catachresis? They are always using "decimate" for "devastate," "chronic" for "severe," "anachronism" for "anomaly" and "alibi" for "excuse." Are they idiots?