The Morning Briefing - June 25, 2015
** The Morning Briefing will not publish from June 29-July 3, returning Monday, July 6
TRENTON – Democratic lawmakers are awakening this glorious sunny morning, forced to get dressed in those blue suits and trudge all the way to Statehouse – knowing their proposed $35.3 billion budget has no chance of being passed. That’s because Democrats are pushing once again for the ill-fated millionaire’s tax and surcharges on business to generate $3.1 billion in payments to the state pension system. Gov. Chris Christie waits on the other side of this charade, ready to veto the tax hikes, as his $33.8 billion plan becomes law. Sigh; another year, another broken promise about shoring up the state’s pension fund.
ATLANTIC CITY — As casinos struggle to survive in Atlantic City, some lawmakers say the key is to actually have more competition. Smarter minds than ours are trying to water down state law to pave the way for new, smaller casinos, with as few as 200 hotel rooms. Future casino owners could also renovate what already exists, rather than build anew. The legislation is all designed to encourage more investment in Atlantic City, so more casino owners can get into the business without constructing $2 billion palaces. But what is the message to the casino owners already saddled with these monstrocities who still must compete?
ATLANTIC CITY – There may be a special heaven waiting for our plagued casino workers, cast off, ignored, disgruntled and dismayed. A job fair is being held today at the Sheraton, as a casino owner on a small South Pacific island is looking to hire experienced workers for Saipan's Best Sunshine International Casino. The Press of AC says, yeah, the casino is 8,000 miles away. But it needs about 180 licensed dealers, pit bosses, cashiers and others. The casino also seems a bit desperate, promising to foot the bill for travel back and forth, signing bonuses, free housing, health insurance and meals on every work shift. Not bad, if you don’t mind commuting across many time zones. And you probably get to deal cards in a grass skirt.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
BOSTON – Entering into eternal rest with your dog Fido, your cat Bootsie, or your parrot Bluebeard may become an option in Massachusetts. Rep. Nick Collins, a Boston Democrat, wants to make the Bay State the fifth in the union – behind New York, Pennsylvania, Virginia and Florida – to allow humans and their deceased pets to be buried together. Opponents, of course, have religious, environmental and sanitary objections. Plus, there may be a timing issue, here. What if Fido isn’t ready to go?
ON VACATION – Time for a well-earned holiday, so let’s destroy your vacation before you even pile into the minivan. The red eyes and nasal irritation you experience at the hotel pool aren’t just from the chlorine. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, says it’s actually “chlorine binding with sweat, urine, and other bodily waste from swimmers." The CDC recommends a long shower before taking the plunge in a public pool. Sadly, even champion Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps admits “everybody pees in the pool." Anyway, enjoy that vacation.
HAZZARD COUNTY, GA – As it appears every lawmaker above the Mason-Dixon line wants to take down the Confederate flag (no, this is not 1863), the national mood is hitting Hazzard County, where the Duke brothers will no longer get to recklessly speed around in the “General Lee” painted with the Confederate flag. Warner Brothers, which licenses die-cast replicas and vehicle model kits of the iconic 1969 Dodger Charger, say the company will no longer license the products. Just wait ‘til Uncle Jessie hears about this.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It was one year ago that Facebook admitted an immediate need for more diversity, as 90 percent of its techs were either white or Asian, with only 15 percent of them of the female persuasion. Yes, welcome to Nerdville.
WORD OF THE DAY
Snollygoster – noun
Definition: A person who can't be trusted
Example: “I always suspect little Johnny pees in my pool, that snollygoster.”