The Morning Briefing - April 22, 2015
NORWOOD – Nature continues to interfere in Bergen County, where we expect our wild animals to remain at a safe and respectful distance. We’ve had a turkey wandering the parking lot of an A&P, and we have been on “coyote watch,” after police nabbed an aggressive canine suspected of attacking a man walking his dog on Sunday. Four coyote dens have been discovered near the Norwood Elementary School, CBS reports, with the kiddies kept safely inside. There have also been some bears discovered in Rockland County suburbs, but that’s outside New Jersey so we don’t care.
FLORENCE TOWNSHIP – Local realtors are likely offering two homes at prices you won’t believe. Sure, they may need some fixing up, and perhaps a visit to Pottery Barn. Oh, and engineers think a landslide may send them tumbling into the Delaware River. But, still, a bargain is a bargain, right? The Trenton Times reports the April rains, a landslide and chronic erosion, coupled with an old sewer system, are the reasons these homes are teetering on the brink.
ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL – While it is often hard to find our governor in New Jersey these days, we can turn on “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” tonight at 11:35 p.m., to capture Gov. Chris Christie yucking it up.
JACKSON – Former Gov. Jim Florio will be with local environmentalists at noon to hike some private property near Six Flags Great Adventure, where the theme park wants to mow down 90 acres of forest near the New Jersey Pinelands National Reserve to install solar panels. Hacking down thousands of trees is all part of Great Adventure’s odd campaign to “go green,” rather than just installing the solar panels on its acres of paved parking lots. Make sense to you? Not to worry; Jim Florio will make it all right.
IN THE MEDIA
It is The Record v. Sarah Palin, as the newspaper reports the former VP candidate was willing to pay $15,000 for the unauthorized use of the Record’s iconic photo of firefighters raising the American flag at Ground Zero just hours after the 9-11 attacks. (We would show the photo here, but don’t need The Record v. the Morning Briefing). Apparently, the settlement with Palin was set, but she wanted a confidentiality clause to preserve her stellar reputation and keep this story out of the Record. It is unclear where this all stands – as this proposed settlement is now a public court document filed in Newark.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
GRAND RAPIDS, MI – “Unstable” seems to be the best way to describe a local woman who opened fire on a McDonald’s when staff forgot to put bacon on her hamburger – twice. It seemed the infraction could be forgivable when the first burger handed through the drive-thru was missing the bacon, NBC reports. She was offered a free meal by apologetic staff. But things got bad when the second order was missing bacon, too. So, as any normal person would do, she fired a bullet into the restaurant. No one was hurt, as the hamburglar and others took cover. But the judge thought she should spend three to seven years behind bars to think about it.
QUEENS, NY – Are we dreaming? The Mets can win their 10th in a row tonight, playing the Braves. Amazin’.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
It’s also amazing that it took until this day in 2011 for a Pope to participate in a televised interview, as Benedict XVI went before the camera. Of course, it was a pre-recorded interview, with pre-screened questions, in case of any pontiff gaffes. No word yet on 24-hour “Pope TV.”
WORD OF THE DAY
Furphy – noun
Definition – A fake report, but usually claimed to be true.
Example – Is the Morning Briefing for real, or just filled with a bunch of furphies?