The Morning Briefing - December 12, 2014
TRENTON – It is the macro-governor vs. the micro-bead. Gov. Chris Christie appears to support a ban on micro-beads, those tiny polyethylene particles found in personal care products that contribute to that huge garbage patch in the Atlantic Ocean about the size of France. But the governor thinks an Assembly bill goes a bit too far, as retailers who ignore the ban would be subject to penalties of up to $10,000 per product, per day, NJ.com reports. “A few tubes of out-of-date face wash combined with overzealous enforcement of this ban could easily drive a small business owner into bankruptcy,” Christie says, suggesting fines of $500 per violation are a bit more appropriate. Micro-beads have been destroying the Earth for years, filtering through your plumbing and out to the ocean, killing everything and adding to the mammoth North American trash vortex. But your face sure looks great.
PATERSON – City school officials and the public at-large are shaking their heads in disbelief, after Politicker reported this billboard in front of School No. 20. “If this is how the administration takes care of signage, how can we expect the students to do better?” asked Paterson School Board Commissioner Corey Teague. Good question. Or, as School No. 20 says, “Gud Kwesthun.”
STATEWIDE – You probably already know this, but just a reminder that it is National Ugly Christmas Sweater Day. According to organizers, today is the day you apparently wear your worst – to school, to work, to a funeral, to a job interview, to your sister's wedding, etc. The day is the brainchild of marketers, of course, in the form of “Tipsy Elves,” which sells this stuff online.
ON THE AIRWAVES – Between all the holiday ads filling the airwaves is a campaign from “Forward New Jersey,” which is trying to alert residents about New Jersey’s crumbling roads and bridges. Forward New Jersey tells us about the 2007 collapse of the I-35 bridge in Minnesota, killing 13. The kicker: New Jersey has 479 bridges in worse shape than the I-35. And those bridges carry 8.2 million cars every day in this state. And there is no money to fix them… And now back to the holiday ads.
NEWARK – Hey commuters, you aren’t the only ones the Port Authority is raking over the coals. United Airlines is equally enraged with fee hikes, saying “unwise choices, inefficiencies and political influences” are prompting skyrocketing fees that make it twice as expensive to fly out of Newark than such cities as Boston or San Francisco, the Record reports. Why, for example, is the Port Authority paying for work on the Pulaski Skyway, which it doesn’t even own? The silver lining for United Airlines is that it can pass additional expenses to travelers. But when it comes to paying all those rising tolls on the bridges and tunnels, we have nowhere to pass the buck.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
FRANKLIN SQUARE, NY – Maybe it made good sense at the time, when chaperones at a Frank Carey High School class trip decided to leave a vomiting student at a convenience store, in the care of a gas station attendant. CBS reports the 16-year-old boy was bounced from the bus and left at Apu’s Quickie-Mart. Chaperones did have the foresight to call the boy’s parents to let them know where he was. Still, parents were outraged, prompting school officials to provide a new “field trip manual,” including plenty of enlightening instructions, such as “Arrive with as many children as you depart with.”
ONLINE – One of the shining moments of the holiday season is the eagerly anticipated release of the annual “Hater’s Guide to the Williams-Sonoma Catalog,” pointing out some of the absolutely ludicrous, outrageously expensive and completely pointless items this company attempts to compel “serious chefs” to buy. Read it here. Caution for the kiddies: Salty language used.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
Some die-hard Jets fans may argue the last time they had a decent quarterback was on this day in 1976, when Joe Namath played his last game in the uniform.